Black bird

[Boss]

It's strange
that the bird song
is that of a bird
The one you knew
seasons ago
when you were 3 or 4
in the backyard
where everything made sense
except the missing father
at dinner time

The guinea-pig hutch
the little fellow
gnawing into carrot
You loved him so much
you squeezed him to death
one day, literally

Cut lawn
had that effect
meticulous
and the odour
In Spring
the onion weed
down by the back shed
spat out the side
of the gardener's mower
Greasy and rich
You were in it

And you catch a bird
with string
and a basket
a black bird
There is no fear
You had no knowledge
of McCartney's 'Blackbird' then
Only a quivering bird
Entrapped
You let him free

And Life gets in the way
as you grow
You forget smells
touch
intuition
they are etched away
You learn the language of the world
of the letter
and number
the abstract

Until crazy at 19
you accept their pharmacological dance
to 'righten things'
help you 'see straight'

And at 37
a black bird challenges you
to a fight
You walk away
in fear
and in envy
of her courage

And you notice
through the years
through the drugs
and self imposed exile
that enlightenment came
the moment you looked
in her eye
and saw yourself

[Fljotsdale]

I like this. Especially the verses before 'until crazy at 19'.

I could see and feel it all.

After 'crazy at 19', although my head understood, my feelings didn't any more. I guess that is because I have no personal experiences that come even close.

It is an odd, mismatched poem in my mind (I'm not saying it would be for every reader! ), because the first part reminds in some ways of my own childhood (a loooong time ago!), but the latter part is full of modern imagery.

[lizzytysh]

I had the same reaction as you did, Fljotsdale ~ a switch from a feeling of memory and nostalgia, rich with sights, sounds, and smells, all of which I, too, was experiencing and wishing for me [in the poem and in my own life]; to an intellectualized accounting and pondering of unfortunate events. At least, that's how I experienced it. All said, however, I LIKE IT! Especially before he turned 19 ~ when he became one of 'the drugged and the dead,' but lived to reflect and tell about it in cogent form.

~ Lizzy

[Boss]

Thank you both for liking it - I like it too. It was written hurriedly, but from the depths. The black bird in the present tense is pertinent for me. Looking in her eye I knew we were one. I often look in animals' eyes, usually dogs and cats. I wonder what they "think" about. Why this meeting of eyes, even between species, why is it so universal? Partly I feel you're seeing yourself in that being and partly you share something inexpressible. A moment. You can be sure Elizabeth even my lithium and sodium valproate can't get in the way of that...

Thank you both

Boss

[lizzytysh]

I often feel they're benevolently tolerant of us, all the non-human creatures. I also feel that same cross-species, universal something when I look into their eyes. Lessons to be learned.

[philo]

there is so much about the animal kingdom we cannot understand. people make assumptions about these sentient beings - that they do not have an understanding of 'self'; that they do not know themselves in the way we humans do. elephants mourn their dead and revisit the corpses of their loved ones, frequently touching them gently with their feet or trunks. if we as humans possess souls then so must our fellow creatures.

[lizzytysh]

Hi Phil ~

One of the tenets of Christianity that separated me from it is the [stated] belief [by the pastors I have asked] that animals do not go to 'heaven' and that they do not possess souls.

How that belief is reconciled with the story of the great flood and Noah's ark baffles me. Why save the animals? A matter of mere convenience for mankind that they be rescued the same as we?

The elephants are an excellent example. I've seen footage of the touching that was enough to move me to tears, and it was many years after their loved ones' deaths. If you see the film "March of the Penguins" ~ and just so many other 'animal' films, as well as listen to their speech patterns with one another, not to mention with us ~ I am at a loss as to how anyone could ever question their souls' existence.

Then, there are the revisits in spirit after their deaths. And reincarnation, wherein animal form is taken. The list goes on...

~ Elizabeth

[Ali]

If animals have no souls, why do they mourn their dead? One I have often pondered on
Sorry hadn't seen this already touched on

[lizzytysh]

I'd say, it's certainly not because of their 'emotional personalities' .

[Fljotsdale]

If animals have no souls, why do they mourn their dead? One I have often pondered on
Sorry hadn't seen this already touched on

Most animals don't. Mourn, I mean. A mother animal may be distressed for a short time if her young one dies or goes missing, but this is a perfectly natural instinct (after all, all young would die of neglect if the mother did not have a strong instinct to nurture it), and has no need of a 'soul' to explain it.

Some animals do mourn. Even for adult deaths, but especially for infant deaths. Elephants are a case in point. But elephants are much more intelligent than most animals, and have very powerful family bonds - a herd is a family grouping.
But, again, why should this imply they have 'souls'?

I do not believe in 'souls' as separable bits containing the 'person' (or animal) that continues on after 'physical death'. A person or animal IS a soul - flesh, bone blood, brain, personality. This idea of an immortal part of us that has a separate/separable existence is all part and parcel of a fear of death. But death is nothing to be afraid of. Everything lives, has it's use, fades, and dies. What is born from us, from anything living, is the future. We share it by engendering it. That is all.
But we humans cannot bear the thought that our loved ones are 'just gone'. We want the comfort of believing they stil live somewhere in happiness. And I can understand that, fully, even though I do not share the belief.

[philo]

yes......... to what you have just said. and no. before i reply let me just say i am playing devils advocate on this one. i am here, with the elephant, sitting on the fence. the argument you have used is always one that is given against that of an immortal soul - that doesnt mean it is not grounded in truth. and we cannot use the fact that we have feelings and emotions to 'prove' that our bodies contain something independent of the material - our makeup is complex and who is to say that personality/emotions/feelings are or are not a product of this chemical/physical cocktail?

so where do we go from there? one ends up chasing ones tail with this one. the only way we can prove something to someone else is with empirical evidence. the closest we might get with finding 'evidence' might be through an out of body experience - and that might be through a near death experience/meditation or through chemical substances of one kind or another. all these experiences are highly personal and cannot, for that reason, be used as proof of 'soul'.

so then we just come down to both religion. for me religion proves nothing. (wont go into that one now!) i spent a long long time searching through religion and experimenting with more direct ways to touch 'soul'. i have returned to a very basic and fundamental 'gut' feeling that i am more than my body. i question whether this is just wishful thinking but am still at the beginning of that journey.

[lizzytysh]

Dear Fljots ~

You know I love you !

The irony in your chosen signature, however, just jumped off the page at me [I successfully dodged it ] ~ and I feel compelled to repeat it here. Notice any key words? :

O chosen love, O frozen love, O tangle of matter and ghost. O darling of angels, demons and saints and the whole broken-hearted host - Gentle this soul. Gentle this soul.

[Of all the words Leonard has ever written or spoken, for you to choose from... ]
As 'they' say, sometimes "the proof is [just right there] in the pudding" .

Love you, Fljots ,
Lizzy

[lizzytysh]

Lovely explanation of your own exploratory journey, Phil , and where you're at now with it.

For me, I don't even question it, anymore. I haven't gone through a 'formalized' [in any way] search; yet, enough has happened with me, and with enough of what I've read, I haven't felt that formalized search to be necessary. I probably won't know for absolute, positive, verifiably sure until 'the time' comes ~ so, I continue to live my life as though I already knew for absolute, positive, verifiably sure that it's true.

The exploration process, however, has so much to be offered in its own right, and can affect, even moreso, how one lives their life.

The examples that Sylvia has given are very very believable for me.

~ Lizzy

[Boss]

Philo,

We are more than just meat and bone. There is an essence which graces us. I'm not sermonising, I have no religious preference. I just see incredible life in all creatures, all vegetation.

After many difficult years battling bipolar disorder I have (over the last 8 years) come to a more restful place. It's odd that sometimes mania opens you up. You see in different perspectives, really get down with the nitty-gritty. And your soul sings songs you barely knew. You find yourself in strange places...

I read you tried religion. Same here. But I didn't discard them - I saw Life in every one of them. They are only guidelines and used with a modicum of wisdom, for some, they can help. For me, G-d is so almighty he transcends all things. And it lives in us...

All the best on your journey

Boss

[lizzytysh]

Hi Boss ~

Even though I agree with your conclusion, I wouldn't use 'electricity' as one of my proofs. I feel that, as much as anything else, that's a scientific phenomenon. Unless you're ready to include lightning and light bulbs as having souls ~ and human beings as capable of inventing and manufacturing them .

I know what you mean with what you're saying; however, do feel that a different word choice would be helpful .

~ Lizzy