Vagrants and Conquistadors

[Teratogen]

Vagrants and Conquistadors

I’d give you the world if it were mine to give,
But in my heart I know that it’s already yours.
And now that my heart has no place to live
I roam with the vagrants and conquistadors
Who, in their shameless glory, travel the road to El Dorado,
Somehow hoping they might capture your heart of gold.
But they settle in the cardboards of their impoverished motto,
That he who remains in love must do as he is told.
And summoned to the wasteland of your great disinterest
They know this is the place where their desire must attest—
Migrating in herds under the stars that form their wish list;
But beggars can’t be choosers, not when it comes to happiness.
And I exist for you now in my happy little cave.
I even exist for you in the dumpster of my grief.
I exist for you in the bonfire of my disheveled faith
And I exist for you in the filth of my disbelief.

But I broke from the chain gang to be love’s fugitive;
My gilded eyes still searching from the mountains to the shores
The sun and rain alike know just how hard it is:
Here the sun is burning, and when it rains it pours.
So I spoke to my voices through a song of false bravado
Where the refrain mentioned your name and a kind of love so bold,
And I slept with the leaves and crickets within some exhausted grotto
Of a memory when my wealth in prosperous love I could uphold.
But I ask myself, “How, oh, how could I have missed this?”
Your love taken for granted, a ransom placed at my behest,
And these unpaid debts come at the cost of doing careless business.
Now there’s a bounty on my head and a warrant for my arrest.
But you who own the world, you still may remain safe;
You whose heart of gold still tempts this thoughtless thief.
But I who own the darkness now cannot escape unscathed;
I who fight the tears of doubt and clench my fist and teeth.