dedicated to Jarkko and this forum:
I entered the house
on the dark side of the street
my hat in my hand
red slippers on my feet
I stood inside the door
closed it slowly tight
there were twos out on the floor
dancing in the light
I put my homburg down
then kicked my slippers off
battling with a frown
I urged a subtle cough
all eyes then turned to me
at my place inside the door
they could plainly see
that I'd been here before
as the music carried on
so subtle and sublime
I stepped into the Avalanche
and the heart of 6/8 time
the rhythm took me then
as I stepped out on the floor
I was in the company of friends
I could wont for nothing more
01 January 2010
I Stepped Into The Avalanche
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vern.silver
- Posts: 181
- Joined: Mon Sep 16, 2002 10:58 pm
- Location: Sault Ste Marie, Canada
I Stepped Into The Avalanche
Last edited by vern.silver on Sat Jan 02, 2010 10:54 am, edited 1 time in total.
"Clarence said a striking thing about rowing that I've always valued ... that he liked rowing because you were approaching life backward. You could clearly see the past, and you glanced quickly at the future over your shoulder.' Jim Harrison.
Re: I Stepped Into The Avalanche
Oh, I love that, Vern. Very appropos.
"Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken."
~ Oscar Wilde
~ Oscar Wilde
Re: I Stepped Into The Avalanche
lizzytysh wrote:
>Oh, I love that, Vern. Very appropos.
What did the line "I put my homgurg down" say to you, Lizzie?
>Oh, I love that, Vern. Very appropos.
What did the line "I put my homgurg down" say to you, Lizzie?
Re: I Stepped Into The Avalanche
Oh, what a New Year's present you give to all of us. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Gina
Gina
Re: I Stepped Into The Avalanche
"Homburg" [possibly a different connotation when misspelled "homgurg," Geoffrey?] was to me a Canadian spelling or typo for hamburg, bought elsewhere... and no food allowed on the dancing floor y'know. It could, though, be a term for something like a satchel. What does the correct spelling of the word say to you, Geoffrey?
"Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken."
~ Oscar Wilde
~ Oscar Wilde
Re: I Stepped Into The Avalanche
lizzytysh wrote:
>"Homburg" [possibly a different connotation when misspelled "homgurg," Geoffrey?] was to me a Canadian spelling or typo for hamburg, bought elsewhere... and no food allowed on the dancing floor y'know. It could, though, be a term for something like a satchel. What does the correct spelling of the word say to you, Geoffrey?
Well, like you it does make me think of a hamburger. But it was a typo; 'g' is diagonally next to 'b' on the keyboard. Unlike my 'controll' spelling in a recent message here. We are but skittles put back into place after every game. The online dictionary, which earlier refused to lend assistance, now happily informs that 'homburg' is a hat - so the mystery is solved. I have never seen the attraction with hats. Not only do they harbour lice, they have to be lifted courteously when meeting people, and one's hair underneath is all pressed down tight against one's skull and looks damned silly. Headgear also has to be held in place with one hand during windy weather, because nothing looks as daft and brings as many guffaws of laughter as the ridiculous sight of a man chasing his hat down the road. Ha ha ha!!!
>"Homburg" [possibly a different connotation when misspelled "homgurg," Geoffrey?] was to me a Canadian spelling or typo for hamburg, bought elsewhere... and no food allowed on the dancing floor y'know. It could, though, be a term for something like a satchel. What does the correct spelling of the word say to you, Geoffrey?
Well, like you it does make me think of a hamburger. But it was a typo; 'g' is diagonally next to 'b' on the keyboard. Unlike my 'controll' spelling in a recent message here. We are but skittles put back into place after every game. The online dictionary, which earlier refused to lend assistance, now happily informs that 'homburg' is a hat - so the mystery is solved. I have never seen the attraction with hats. Not only do they harbour lice, they have to be lifted courteously when meeting people, and one's hair underneath is all pressed down tight against one's skull and looks damned silly. Headgear also has to be held in place with one hand during windy weather, because nothing looks as daft and brings as many guffaws of laughter as the ridiculous sight of a man chasing his hat down the road. Ha ha ha!!!
Re: I Stepped Into The Avalanche
Quite glad you discovered its real meaning, Geoffrey. To think of all the laughs I'd've missed. LOL. . . they have to be lifted courteously when meeting people, and one's hair underneath is all pressed down tight against one's skull and looks damned silly. Headgear also has to be held in place with one hand during windy weather, because nothing looks as daft and brings as many guffaws of laughter as the ridiculous sight of a man chasing his hat down the road. Ha ha ha!!!
"Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken."
~ Oscar Wilde
~ Oscar Wilde
Re: I Stepped Into The Avalanche
lizzytysh wrote:
>Quite glad you discovered its real meaning, Geoffrey. To think of all the laughs I'd've missed
Well, it's acceptable to include a word in a poem if people are generally acquainted with the meaning, but it's unfortunate if readers are mostly unfamiliar with its definition. You and I did not know, apparently, what 'homburg' meant, but perhaps we are in the minority. Yet if we are amongst the majority, the author may wish to consider a rewrite. For having to look words up in a dictionary, as educational as it definitely is, reduces one's flow of enjoyment; puts a stumbling block into the poem. In a novel one can more or less be as grandiloquent as one desires, and also in prose - to a certain extent - though most people have to look up the word 'pederasty' in Ginsburg's 'Howl'. And when reading Peter Rabbit we all had to reach for the dictionary after Beatrix Potter wrote about "the soporiphic effect of lettuce". But if a poet is pursuing success, short verse that challenges the ordinary reader's vocabulary should be avoided.
>Quite glad you discovered its real meaning, Geoffrey. To think of all the laughs I'd've missed
Well, it's acceptable to include a word in a poem if people are generally acquainted with the meaning, but it's unfortunate if readers are mostly unfamiliar with its definition. You and I did not know, apparently, what 'homburg' meant, but perhaps we are in the minority. Yet if we are amongst the majority, the author may wish to consider a rewrite. For having to look words up in a dictionary, as educational as it definitely is, reduces one's flow of enjoyment; puts a stumbling block into the poem. In a novel one can more or less be as grandiloquent as one desires, and also in prose - to a certain extent - though most people have to look up the word 'pederasty' in Ginsburg's 'Howl'. And when reading Peter Rabbit we all had to reach for the dictionary after Beatrix Potter wrote about "the soporiphic effect of lettuce". But if a poet is pursuing success, short verse that challenges the ordinary reader's vocabulary should be avoided.
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vern.silver
- Posts: 181
- Joined: Mon Sep 16, 2002 10:58 pm
- Location: Sault Ste Marie, Canada
Re: I Stepped Into The Avalanche
Well Geoffrey, I mulled over the idea for some time of whether I should bother with your remarks regarding the responsibility of the ‘poet’ to use simple common words so as not to confuse the reader. I guess I just assumed that those who are interested in poetry would be the type of person who would take their time with the words and construct before them. Let’s face it, in reading much of our master’s work there are many references to his religion as well as other things which have forced me to ‘look it up’ or ask questions. Recently, and on another thread there was a conversation on what the line ‘a crack in everything’ meant with many readers responding with their own interpretations. There has been the ongoing discussion of ‘Book of Mercy’ in the Leonard Cohen’s poetry and novels thread of this forum which has over 500 replies for #27 to #46 so far.
In T. S. Elliots poem ‘The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock’ there are the lines:
‘For the yellow smoke that slides along the street,
Rubbing its back upon the window-panes; …’
I love the images of these lines, but it took reading more about Eliot and this poem in particular before I learned that he was talking about the ‘acid fog,’ resulting from the coal burning industrial revolution that killed many Londoners in those days. Living in a small Northern Ontario city, this was outside my experience. But I took the time to make it part of my intellectual experience and my desire to learn more from the things I read than to be satisifed with interpretations based on my own limited competence.
In a poem of mine which I posted on this forum some time ago – Unrequited Love – I have the line ‘covered in the must of regret.’ Must seems like a simple word – be obliged to, ought to, should – but it is also the unfermented juice of the grape and a musty condition or mould the last being what I intended.
Recently at work I happened on a couple of coworkers who were trying to figure out why spell check did not mark ‘wont’ as a spelling error – the had intended won’t. I had to tell them that wont was in fact a word, which the fact that spell check showed it as being correct should have signalled to them. Sometime later I asked them if they had ever looked up the word to see what it meant. Neither had. Such it is in dealing with lazy minds!
In this poem – I Stepped Into The Avalanche – in the first stanza I entered the house with my hat in my hand (not a hamburger – a Big Mac or a Whopper which could have taken the discussion in a whole new direction.
) In the third it is what was put down – it was what was in the hand after all. To me this is just lazy reading and not the fault of me as the writer. Sure, I could have used fedora, or maybe baseball cap, but I chose homburg because it fit the rhythm. And it was a word I knew.
The Homburg was the hat that Winston Churchill wears in many of the photo’s we see of him and is very similar to the fedora which Leonard and troupe are wearing on this tour. This from a web site which sells them:
Vern
In T. S. Elliots poem ‘The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock’ there are the lines:
‘For the yellow smoke that slides along the street,
Rubbing its back upon the window-panes; …’
I love the images of these lines, but it took reading more about Eliot and this poem in particular before I learned that he was talking about the ‘acid fog,’ resulting from the coal burning industrial revolution that killed many Londoners in those days. Living in a small Northern Ontario city, this was outside my experience. But I took the time to make it part of my intellectual experience and my desire to learn more from the things I read than to be satisifed with interpretations based on my own limited competence.
In a poem of mine which I posted on this forum some time ago – Unrequited Love – I have the line ‘covered in the must of regret.’ Must seems like a simple word – be obliged to, ought to, should – but it is also the unfermented juice of the grape and a musty condition or mould the last being what I intended.
Recently at work I happened on a couple of coworkers who were trying to figure out why spell check did not mark ‘wont’ as a spelling error – the had intended won’t. I had to tell them that wont was in fact a word, which the fact that spell check showed it as being correct should have signalled to them. Sometime later I asked them if they had ever looked up the word to see what it meant. Neither had. Such it is in dealing with lazy minds!
In this poem – I Stepped Into The Avalanche – in the first stanza I entered the house with my hat in my hand (not a hamburger – a Big Mac or a Whopper which could have taken the discussion in a whole new direction.
) In the third it is what was put down – it was what was in the hand after all. To me this is just lazy reading and not the fault of me as the writer. Sure, I could have used fedora, or maybe baseball cap, but I chose homburg because it fit the rhythm. And it was a word I knew. The Homburg was the hat that Winston Churchill wears in many of the photo’s we see of him and is very similar to the fedora which Leonard and troupe are wearing on this tour. This from a web site which sells them:
I have no desire to shut down my own vocabulary to ease the frail egos of lazy readers. And I would not have had to look up ‘pederasty’ when reading Ginsberg’s work. It is in my ‘dictionary’ already.The homburg hat was popularized by Edward VII after visiting Germany and bringing back a hat of this style. It is one of the oldest formal style hats and was favored by many politicians and diplomats in the mid-twentieth century. The "Godfather" hat as it is also referred to, was made popular by many legendary gangster & mafia movies made in Hollywood. The biggest names in the world of hip-hop brought it back into style in the late 1990s and is still popular with many artists of today.
Vern
"Clarence said a striking thing about rowing that I've always valued ... that he liked rowing because you were approaching life backward. You could clearly see the past, and you glanced quickly at the future over your shoulder.' Jim Harrison.
Re: I Stepped Into The Avalanche
vern.silver wrote:
>Geoffrey, I mulled over the idea for some time of whether I should bother with your remarks . . .
You had negative feelings towards my remarks concerning usage of unfamiliar words in poetry? I thought a valid point had been raised, but am aware how sensitive one can be when a critic nears what can be construed as criticism. An ego thirsts only after praise. For this reason I avoided addressing you directly, so that you could decide, without pressure, whether or not to "bother" making a comment. I feel fortunate this time, that you favoured me with a response - for you composed a long and unexpectedly thoughtful reply. Very appreciated feedback. Thank you.
>Geoffrey, I mulled over the idea for some time of whether I should bother with your remarks . . .
You had negative feelings towards my remarks concerning usage of unfamiliar words in poetry? I thought a valid point had been raised, but am aware how sensitive one can be when a critic nears what can be construed as criticism. An ego thirsts only after praise. For this reason I avoided addressing you directly, so that you could decide, without pressure, whether or not to "bother" making a comment. I feel fortunate this time, that you favoured me with a response - for you composed a long and unexpectedly thoughtful reply. Very appreciated feedback. Thank you.
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vern.silver
- Posts: 181
- Joined: Mon Sep 16, 2002 10:58 pm
- Location: Sault Ste Marie, Canada
Re: I Stepped Into The Avalanche
Geoffrey,
It was not that I had negative feelings towards your remarks that had me hesitating, but that I thought that you were just having some fun. So after my mulling, I decided that your comments did indeed deserve a response. But I still think you were just having fun.
Vern
It was not that I had negative feelings towards your remarks that had me hesitating, but that I thought that you were just having some fun. So after my mulling, I decided that your comments did indeed deserve a response. But I still think you were just having fun.
Vern
"Clarence said a striking thing about rowing that I've always valued ... that he liked rowing because you were approaching life backward. You could clearly see the past, and you glanced quickly at the future over your shoulder.' Jim Harrison.
Re: I Stepped Into The Avalanche
>It was not that I had negative feelings towards your remarks that had me hesitating, but that I thought that you were just having some fun. So after my mulling, I decided that your comments did indeed deserve a response. But I still think you were just having fun.
I am intrigued. You hesitated because you thought, as you still do, that I was having fun - yet after mulling decided my comments deserved a response. Not just a courteous few lines, I might add - but a long and delightful exposé. How fascinating for a student of psychology it would be to learn how, via mental consideration alone, one is able to reverse one's initial decision. But unfortunately you afford your readers no information whatsoever into this mental process. You offer no hint as to how one's thoughts can arrive at a conclusion quite different from what originally was in the mind. At first you hesitated, but cerebral impulses caused you to think again. Certain electronic signals in your brain became actively opposed to its primary decision and demanded that cognitive reasoning occur. You suffered an internal conflict, a skirmish, even a mini war, perhaps - and carried it all around in the top of your head. And all because of me having fun? You make me blush. Deciding that I deserved a response allowed your skull to get rid of it all, and that must have been a great relief to you.
I am intrigued. You hesitated because you thought, as you still do, that I was having fun - yet after mulling decided my comments deserved a response. Not just a courteous few lines, I might add - but a long and delightful exposé. How fascinating for a student of psychology it would be to learn how, via mental consideration alone, one is able to reverse one's initial decision. But unfortunately you afford your readers no information whatsoever into this mental process. You offer no hint as to how one's thoughts can arrive at a conclusion quite different from what originally was in the mind. At first you hesitated, but cerebral impulses caused you to think again. Certain electronic signals in your brain became actively opposed to its primary decision and demanded that cognitive reasoning occur. You suffered an internal conflict, a skirmish, even a mini war, perhaps - and carried it all around in the top of your head. And all because of me having fun? You make me blush. Deciding that I deserved a response allowed your skull to get rid of it all, and that must have been a great relief to you.
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imaginary friend
- Posts: 1371
- Joined: Fri Jun 22, 2007 5:09 am
- Location: Vancouver, Canada
Re: I Stepped Into The Avalanche
Oh Geoffrey, give it up!
Vern's a good guy. Pick on someone your own size. Like me. Ha-ha.
(Whrrrrrrrrrsssssnap!)
Vern's a good guy. Pick on someone your own size. Like me. Ha-ha.
(Whrrrrrrrrrsssssnap!)
Re: I Stepped Into The Avalanche
imaginary friend wrote:
>Oh Geoffrey, give it up! Vern's a good guy. Pick on someone your own size. Like me. Ha-ha.
Vern is a good guy? You are telling me he is dull. You make him sound uninspired and boring, and that is unfair. But were he indeed, as you claim, the owner of such a predictably prosaic personality, is it not thanks to 'bad guys' that unexciting behaviour may be compared and recognised? You are feeling neglected, imaginary friend - but fret not. For there are few boundaries hindering where my attention may be focused. Should you be fortunate enough to capture my interest, the extent of my interaction becomes limitless - even interfering busybodies like yourself can be graced with a response. There are many fine contributions to this poetry section, and yet they wither and wilt without having enjoyed even the most mediocre of comments from readers. Verse that has been laboured upon for many a long hour sinks unacknowledged into the depths of nothingness like sailors' turds. Vern, on the other hand, has struck oil. The way he teeters on the edge of simmering ill-humour and irritation is a magnet to the creative manipulator. It makes one feel powerful. The slightest nudge and the pinball machine can be tilted, his tolerance gone, no more mulling - game over.
>Oh Geoffrey, give it up! Vern's a good guy. Pick on someone your own size. Like me. Ha-ha.
Vern is a good guy? You are telling me he is dull. You make him sound uninspired and boring, and that is unfair. But were he indeed, as you claim, the owner of such a predictably prosaic personality, is it not thanks to 'bad guys' that unexciting behaviour may be compared and recognised? You are feeling neglected, imaginary friend - but fret not. For there are few boundaries hindering where my attention may be focused. Should you be fortunate enough to capture my interest, the extent of my interaction becomes limitless - even interfering busybodies like yourself can be graced with a response. There are many fine contributions to this poetry section, and yet they wither and wilt without having enjoyed even the most mediocre of comments from readers. Verse that has been laboured upon for many a long hour sinks unacknowledged into the depths of nothingness like sailors' turds. Vern, on the other hand, has struck oil. The way he teeters on the edge of simmering ill-humour and irritation is a magnet to the creative manipulator. It makes one feel powerful. The slightest nudge and the pinball machine can be tilted, his tolerance gone, no more mulling - game over.
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imaginary friend
- Posts: 1371
- Joined: Fri Jun 22, 2007 5:09 am
- Location: Vancouver, Canada
Re: I Stepped Into The Avalanche
I think of Vern as a thoughtful, compassionate and kindhearted person. I don't consider those qualities dull at all! I've found his recent poems to be engaging and polished; in my unqualified opinion he has raised the bar with them.
Geoffrey, you are such a provacateur, but you are correct on 2 counts: I was feeling neglected, and there are deserving poems posted here that do not receive much (or sometimes any) response.
Boss posed the question once: 'Why do we come here?' ...and answered his own question: 'Seeking attention mostly.' Indeed, but we also come here to communicate with others who share our appreciation of Leonard Cohen's music and poetry. There are not many people in my family or small circle of friends who share this with me; in fact most have never heard of Leonard Cohen, and I am able to play and learn on this Forum in ways I'm unable to otherwise.
Regarding the members poetry, there are poems posted that stand out immediately; they strike a sometimes personal, sometimes universal chord. It is easy and natural to respond to them, as it is to the clever/witty ones, the bagatelles. There are others which merit closer inspection, and still others which I don't ever 'get'. Sometimes I will come back to a poem to re-read, and find that someone else has already responded, from a more educated or interesting POV than I could offer. Does that ever happen to you? I try not to hurt the feelings of others (I don't like having mine hurt and assume they feel likewise), but I'm not comfortable with saying nice things without meaning them, just to be nice. A number of 'regulars' here have migrated to another forum where only niceness is tolerated. I don't think I'll be joining them anytime soon. The great beauty of Jarkko's forum is that there is room for all POVs here; writers by profession, writers by hobby, writers by desire. Educated opinions, simple opinions, complex opinions. That is an energizing mix, and your presence most certainly is a part of that for me.
However, I plead not guilty to busybodydom, your honour. As a man of the world, on your occasional visits to the upstairs of the wine store, you must have noticed that only those who enjoy being spanked request the attentions of the masked lady
Geoffrey, you are such a provacateur, but you are correct on 2 counts: I was feeling neglected, and there are deserving poems posted here that do not receive much (or sometimes any) response.
Boss posed the question once: 'Why do we come here?' ...and answered his own question: 'Seeking attention mostly.' Indeed, but we also come here to communicate with others who share our appreciation of Leonard Cohen's music and poetry. There are not many people in my family or small circle of friends who share this with me; in fact most have never heard of Leonard Cohen, and I am able to play and learn on this Forum in ways I'm unable to otherwise.
Regarding the members poetry, there are poems posted that stand out immediately; they strike a sometimes personal, sometimes universal chord. It is easy and natural to respond to them, as it is to the clever/witty ones, the bagatelles. There are others which merit closer inspection, and still others which I don't ever 'get'. Sometimes I will come back to a poem to re-read, and find that someone else has already responded, from a more educated or interesting POV than I could offer. Does that ever happen to you? I try not to hurt the feelings of others (I don't like having mine hurt and assume they feel likewise), but I'm not comfortable with saying nice things without meaning them, just to be nice. A number of 'regulars' here have migrated to another forum where only niceness is tolerated. I don't think I'll be joining them anytime soon. The great beauty of Jarkko's forum is that there is room for all POVs here; writers by profession, writers by hobby, writers by desire. Educated opinions, simple opinions, complex opinions. That is an energizing mix, and your presence most certainly is a part of that for me.
However, I plead not guilty to busybodydom, your honour. As a man of the world, on your occasional visits to the upstairs of the wine store, you must have noticed that only those who enjoy being spanked request the attentions of the masked lady