To heck with it, I'll just retype it myself. Here it is:
You might be a Floridian if:
You exhibit a slight twitch when introduced to anyone with the first names of Charley, Frances, or Ivan
Your freezer never has more than $20 worth of food in it at any given time
You're looking at paint swatches for the plywood on your windows, to accent the house colour
You think of your hall closet/saferoom as "cozy"
Your pool is more accurately described as "framed in" than "screened in"
Your freezer in the garage now only has homemade ice in it
You no longer worry about relatives visiting during the summer months
You, too, haven't heard back from the insurance adjuster
You now understand what that little "2% hurricane deductible" phrase really means
You're putting a collage together on your driveway of roof shingles from your neighbourhood
You were once proud of your 16" electric chain saw
Your street has more than 3 "NO WAKE" signs posted
You now own 5 large ice chests
Your parrot can now say, "hammered, pounded, hunker down"
You recoognize people in line at the gas, plywood, and free ice locations
You stop what you're doing and clap and wave when you see a convoy of power company trucks come down your street
You're depressed when they don't stop
You have the personal cell phone numbers of the managers for: plywood, roofing supplies, and generators at Home Depot on your speed dialer
You've spent more than $20 on "Tall white kitchen bags" to make your own sand bags.
You're considering upgrading your 16" to a 20" chainsaw
You know what "Bar chain oil" is
You're thinking of getting your spouse the hardhat with the ear protector and face shield for Christmas
You now think the $6,000 whole house generator seems reasonable
You look forward to discussions about the merits of "cubed, block, and dry ice"
Your therapist refers to your condition as "generator envy"
You fight the urge to put on your winter coat and wool cap and parade around in front of your picture window, when you finally get power and your neighbour across the street, with the noisy generator, doesn't get electric
And, finally, you might be a Floridian if:
You ask your sister up north to start saving the Sunday Real Estate classifieds
