What the hell is going on??

[Boss]

I don't get it
Why would I be suicidal?
Mat James was right
that was the last post on that thread
My holiday is over
I'm safe, it is 12.41 am
Buddy is snoring

To be honest
I'm so bloody good
I just want to take on the world

The 90's were a dark decade
but I have grown stronger
and stronger over the last five years
from 13,700,000,016 to 13,7 - 21

I'm a little embarassed
but very touched by your concern
I really am

Thank you for being 'with' me
in Alice Springs
and Darwin
and Perth

I learnt so much

Manna, about that poem...

[Manna]

I probably won't finish your poem, Adam. My world is smaller and more personal than yours. It just isn't the kind of thing I have ever felt I needed to write about. When I try to write about the world that is outside my personal world, I always fail. Which means I am not satisfied with the writing. I'm not future oriented enough to be able to have a vision of it, whether bleak or blissful.

If you want, we can do an exquisite corpse. Do you know what it is? Someone writes a first line. The next person sees that line and writes the next line. Every subsequent person sees only the line that came before. You usually end up with a fun pile of nonsense. Wanna play?

[Boss]

Hey, it's now 1.11 am, gotta' get some sleep.

Stay cool, sister

In peace
Boss

[lizzytysh]

Ahhhhhhhh... the message I wanted to see . Knowing that all is well in your world is enough for me, Adam. If I had known your "long journey" had been a literal one and the context of a couple other of your comments, I wouldn't have reacted as I did to all that surrounded it. Still, I'm glad you appreciate our concern. Sometimes, it gets expressed in the oddest ways, right? I know I'm overly sensitive to considerations of suicide because of experiencing ones where there appeared to be NO clues leading up to them; a lot of stuff going on internally, absent any clear outward signs; and even apparent 'sudden' reversals in mental/emotional status.

Better safe than sorry, and I'm glad you're okay. Now, having read Manna's message, perhaps, you'd like to finish your own poem.


Love,
Lizzy
Elizabeth

[Manna]

here is the exquisite corpse we wrote in one of my writing classes:

A frog jumped into a pile of jello
Hiding among the glittering mass
Its muttled surface seeming so crass
Reminded me so much of the nooks and crannies of my past
Which shield me from the light
That never reaches my boot black soles
Tar-covered, they squelch
A sticky sickening herald
Of muddied, bloodied life
Seeping out on the pavement
Through the tiptoeing rain
I am soaked to the bone
All I want to do, is shake off like a dog.
I also have wanted to fly to the moon but I get motion sickness.

[lizzytysh]

Was the last line yours, Manna ?

Some actually have a certain kind of continuity and make sense metaphorically, especially in the beginning lines.

How would you keep the previous lines from being seen here? I could understand easily in person, by must folding the paper and passing it on.


~ Lizzy


Sleep well, Adam. I know I'll sleep better tonight. I'm very glad that you were very touched by our concern. You could easily have made fun of us about it, or at least of me. I was ready for it, though .

[lazariuk]

I don't get it

It's a good question Boss.

I can tell you what it looks like to me. It seems that aside from everything else you triggered a display of people trying to bring comfort to you and to each other.

I can't think of a better thing to be doing during closing time. I recently saw an interview with Leonard that might bear on this. He was speaking about the song that you seem to like.

“The Future” sounds true to me. It sounds like the situation we have now and the attitudes that are taken there which are all extremists, which are all defensive in the extreme seem to be the mental landscape that people are strolling through today. There is no comfort at the center, as a matter of fact there is no center.

I think somewhere later in the interview he speaks of the hope of finding comfort before closing time.
You can see the interview at : http://youtube.com/watch?v=byU2wBRShs0&feature=related

Might be a worthwhile thing to be thinking of at the end of a journey, "are you more comfortable?"

[lizzytysh]

Thanks for your very kind thoughts on all of this, Jack. What you say and what you've quoted are so true.

One of the many quotes that I loved in Leonard's "The Future" interview was his speculation on "What is the proper behaviour for people in a flood?" Need to watch it, again, to get his exact wording, but it sure was a profound comment on our attitudes and interactions with others, regardless of ALL else.


~ Lizzy