Faith

[Byron]

Allow the self to fall
Into oblivion,
Leaving, trusting,
Held by God

Loosen ties and cords
Held, tethered
To self, to the rest, to the other

Watch unravelling umbilicii,
Feel weightlessness
spread its warm fronds through senses and flesh,
Oozing inexorably

Bliss achieved, rains/reigns through my being.

Faith.

[Steven]

Byron,

I like this poem. The imagery elicited by "unravelling umbilicii" was, to me,
that of a kind of coral reef undulating place, where there is a balance that allows
for the presence of an ego-based sense to be absent, all the while safely
containing a deeper self. The womb like assocations with "umbiliciil,"
-- among them an aqueous protective environment, contributed to the
imagery.

[jimbo]

yes Iliked it too
return to innocence of the womb
so peaceful.so calm
suspended animation like

[Byron]

How to tie down the essence of letting go while holding firmly to ethereal significance? It ain't an easy one to describe in carefully selected words. Pain and Faith are bedfellows. Only partially known to the recipient, but better known than the 'object' of the descriptions.

[Alan Alda]

Hey B~

You've done a good job setting a mood.

A couple things came to mind when I first read it:

I wonder if it would still work IF it was taken into the realm of a generic "faith" by eliminating the specific pronouncement of "God" ? You have specifically created a 'religious/God-based piece. That is limiting to the reader, whereas "faith" has many, many other faces.

spread its warm fronds through senses and flesh,
Oozing inexorably

I found "inexorably" a mouthful of a word that doesn't read aloud well, especially as a line-end. And since "ooze/ing" is one of my favorite words, I saw that it could be given more emphasis if it was moved to: warm fronds, oozing through senses and flesh...

Just some thoughts...

Nice piece.

L

[Byron]

Allow the self to fall
Into oblivion,
leaving, trusting,
held

Loosening ties and cords
tethered
to self, to the rest, to the other

Watch unravelling umbilicii,
feel weightlessness
spread its warm fronds
oozing through senses and flesh,
repairing

Bliss achieved, rains/reigns through my being.

Faith.