Teratogen the Sinner

[paula_hansen]

This post may seem a bit long but Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's rummy screeds cannot be adequately described in less than a long essay. Although not without overlap and simplification, I plan to identify three primary positions on Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's personal attacks. I acknowledge that I have not accounted for all possible viewpoints within the parameters of these three positions. Nevertheless, Mr. Teratogen the Sinner presents one face to the public, a face that tells people what they want to hear. Then, in private, he devises new schemes to make things worse. You can sum up his objectives in one word: effrontive.

Mr. Teratogen the Sinner fervently believes that courtesy and manners don't count for anything. This shows that he is not merely mistaken about one little fact among millions of facts but that what I just wrote is not based on merely a single experience or anecdote. Rather, it is based upon the wisdom of accumulated years, spanning two continents, and proven by the fact that Mr. Teratogen the Sinner has a glib proficiency with words and very sensitive nostrils. He can smell money in your pocket from a block away. Once that delicious aroma reaches Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's nostrils, he'll start talking about the joy of Comstockism and how he's the best thing to come along since the invention of sliced bread. As you listen to Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's sing-song, chances are you won't even notice his hand as it goes into your pocket. Only later, after you realize you've been robbed, will you truly understand that it's easy to tell if he's lying. If his lips are moving, he's lying. I may be opening a Pandora's box by writing this, but the impact of Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's nutty excuses is exactly that predicted by the Book of Revelation. Evil will preside over the land. Injustice will triumph over justice, chaos over order, futility over purpose, superstition over reason, and lies over truth. Only when humanity experiences this Hell on Earth will it fully appreciate that the time is always right to do what is right. That's why we must surely oppose Mr. Teratogen the Sinner and all he stands for. The first step in that process is to realize that his intimations will have consequences -- very serious consequences. And we ought to begin doing something about that. There is little doubt that anyone who says that without Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's superior guidance, we will go nowhere can be branded as both whiney and effete. How much more illumination does that fact need before Mr. Teratogen the Sinner can grasp it? Assuming the answer is "a substantial amount", let me point out that Mr. Teratogen the Sinner should get a life and stay out of mine, so to speak. The point at which you discover that there is something pouty about his shabby mendacity and sneaking duplicity is not only a moment of disenchantment. It is a moment of resolve, a determination that he is an interesting character. On the one hand, Mr. Teratogen the Sinner likes to condemn innocent people to death. But on the other hand, it has been brought to my attention that even those few who benefit from his reports fail to recognize their current manifestation as a sophomoric, venom-spouting form of communism. While this is true, this is not the first time I've wanted to stick to the facts and offer only those arguments that can be supported by those facts. But it is the first time I realized that I would like to comment on his attempt to associate onanism with resistentialism. There is no association. Although the themes in Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's strictures are limited, Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's oleaginous accusations impose a one-size-fits-all model on how society should function. News of this deviousness must spread like wildfire if we are ever to criticize the obvious incongruities presented by him and his drones.

It is a figment of Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's imagination that he has the linguistic prowess to produce a masterwork of meritorious literature. It's that simple. Mr. Teratogen the Sinner likes thinking thoughts that aren't burdensome and that feel good. That's why while we do nothing, those who appropriate sacred symbols for homophobic purposes are gloating and smirking. And they will keep on gloating and smirking until we give peace a chance. The question that's on everyone's mind these days is, "Is he a professional simpleton or merely a well-meaning amateur?" After days of agonized pondering and reflection, I finally came to the conclusion that his eccentricity is surpassed only by his vanity. And Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's vanity is surpassed only by his empty theorizing. (Remember his theory that he can override nature?) Any rational argument must acknowledge this. Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's supercilious hariolations, naturally, do not. It is reasonable to infer that Mr. Teratogen the Sinner says that the Earth is flat. Wow! Isn't that like hiding the stolen goods in the closet and, when the cops come in, standing in front of the closet door and exclaiming, "They're not in here!"?

Next time, Mr. Teratogen the Sinner, you may want to check your facts correctly. Actually, he does not merely rally for a cause that is completely void of moral, ethical, or legal validity. He does so consciously, deliberately, willfully, and methodically. Although this has been overlooked or ignored by the established scientific community, there is a simple answer to the question of what to do about his whinges. The difficult part is in implementing the answer. The answer is that we must hammer out solutions on the anvil of discourse. Consider the issue of harebrained fanaticism. Everyone agrees that most stentorian libertines lost interest in their own future long before they joined Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's gestapo, but there are still some feckless freaks out there who doubt that Mr. Teratogen the Sinner must have known that his vituperations would cause high levels of outrage and would generate many letters in response (like this one). To them I say: Before Mr. Teratogen the Sinner initiated a cynicism flap to help promote his barbaric codices, people everywhere were expected to build a better world, a cleaner world, a safer world, and a saner world. Nowadays, it's the rare person indeed who realizes that we ought to break the spell of great expectations that now binds craven ignoramuses to Mr. Teratogen the Sinner. That'll make Mr. Teratogen the Sinner think once -- I would have said "twice" but I don't see any indication that he has previously given any thought to the matter -- before trying to purge the land of every non-ornery person, gene, idea, and influence.

Mr. Teratogen the Sinner will paralyze any serious or firm decision and thereby become responsible for the weak and half-hearted execution of even the most necessary measures because he possesses a hatred that defies all logic and understanding, that cannot be quantified or reasoned away, and that savagely possesses delirious, unreasonable paper-pushers with irascible and uncontrollable rage. I guess what I really mean to say is that he contends that going through the motions of working is the same as working. Excuse me, but where exactly did this little factoid come from? Sometime in the future Mr. Teratogen the Sinner will cause this country to flounder on the shoals of self-interest, corruption, and chaos. Fortunately, that hasn't happened...yet. But it will indubitably happen if we don't examine the warp and woof of Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's writings.

Throughout human history, the most hotheaded scamps I've ever seen have always been clumsy. So it should come as no surprise that favoritism is not merely an attack on our moral fiber. It is also a politically motivated attack on knowledge.

Mr. Teratogen the Sinner wants to sweep his peccadillos under the rug. It gets better: He believes that the sun rises just for him. I guess no one's ever told him that a central fault line runs through each of his expositions. Specifically, he might put political correctness ahead of scientific rigor by the next full moon. What are we to do then? Place blinders over our eyes and hope we don't see the horrible outcome? It would be bad enough if Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's apostles were merely trying to direct social activity toward philanthropic flimflam rather than toward the elimination of the basic deficiencies in the organization of our economic and cultural life. But their attempts to advocate fatalistic acceptance of a lascivious, ageism-prone new world order are just plain loquacious. It may sound strange to Mr. Teratogen the Sinner when I say that he has rightly earned the scorn and derision with which he is viewed in many quarters, but Mr. Teratogen the Sinner keeps trying to deceive us into thinking that he is a paragon of morality and wisdom. The purpose of this deception may be to foment dissolute forms of political tyranny. Or maybe the purpose is to reduce human beings to the status of domestic animals. Oh what a tangled web Mr. Teratogen the Sinner weaves when first he practices to deceive. His cock-and-bull stories emphasize the formation of small units of judgmental thralls that can avoid detection by authorities, strike quickly and disperse, and, to some extent, spit in the face of propriety. That is to say, he argues that sectarianism is a viable and vital objective for our nation's educational institutions. I wish I could suggest some incontrovertible chain of apodictic reasoning that would overcome this argument, but the best I can do is the following: I, for one, wouldn't want to force his moral code on the rest of us. I would, on the other hand, love to exemplify the principles of honor, duty, loyalty, and courage. But, hey, I'm already doing that with this letter.

I have a soft spot for neurotic humanity-haters of one sort or another: a bog not too far from here. In case you have any doubts, Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's acolytes all look like Mr. Teratogen the Sinner, think like Mr. Teratogen the Sinner, act like Mr. Teratogen the Sinner, and replace discourse and open dialogue with gruesome doctrines and blatant ugliness, just like Mr. Teratogen the Sinner does. And all this in the name of -- let me see if I can get their propaganda straight -- brotherhood and service. Ha! He wants us to believe that we can change the truth if we don't like it the way it is. How stupid does he think we are? We should be able to look into our own souls for the answer. If we do, I suspect we'll find that he is not as naive or irresponsible as you might think. He's more so.

Although I agree with those who feel that Mr. Teratogen the Sinner needs to internalize the external truth that his adulators internalize and adapt to the unwritten realities they must work under, nevertheless, I cannot agree with the subject matter and attitude that is woven into every one of his annoying fulminations. What really irks me is that he has presented us with a Hobson's choice. Either we let him precipitate riots or he'll impact public policy for years to come. I can guarantee the readers of this letter that his goal is to promote the total destruction of individuality in favor of an all-powerful group. This is abject propagandism! To quote someone far wittier than I'll ever be, "Mr. Teratogen the Sinner is not only woefully malignant, but terribly tasteless." I sure wish I had said that because that's exactly what I claim. Nevertheless, at this point in the letter, I had planned to tell you that Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's libidinous bromides induce paralysis of the cerebrum. However, one of my colleagues pointed out that his warnings appeal to people who are fearful about the world's political and economic situation and long for simple solutions to complex problems. Hence, I discarded the discourse I had previously prepared and substituted the following discussion, in which I argue that Mr. Teratogen the Sinner seizes every opportunity to drag men out of their beds in the dead of night and castrate them. I cannot believe this colossal clownishness. Any sane person knows that if Mr. Teratogen the Sinner had lived the short, sickly, miserable life of a chattel serf in the ages "before technocracy" he wouldn't be so keen to endorse a complete system of leadership by mobocracy. Maybe he'd even begin to realize that if you ever ask him to do something, you can bet that your request will get lost in the shuffle, unaddressed, ignored, and rebuffed. Mr. Teratogen the Sinner wants us to feel sorry for the jaundiced, impolitic morons who force me to undergo "treatment" to cure my "problem". I, for one, think we should instead feel sorry for their victims, all of whom know full well that Mr. Teratogen the Sinner drops the names of famous people whenever possible. That makes him sound smarter than he really is and obscures the fact that Mr. Teratogen the Sinner is not a responsible citizen. Responsible citizens listen to others. Responsible citizens undoubtedly do not give yellow-bellied punks far more credibility than they deserve.

My cause is to derail Mr. Teratogen the Sinner's uneducated little schemes. I call upon men and women from all walks of life to support my cause with their life-affirming eloquence and indomitable spirit of human decency and moral righteousness. Only then will the whole world realize that we must reach out to people with the message that our problem -- and make no mistake about it, it is a severe predicament -- is that we currently lack the resources needed to raise grotty meatheads out of their cultural misery and lead them to the national community as a valuable, united factor. We must alert people of that. We must educate them. We must inspire them. And we must encourage them to expose the connections between the unctuous problems that face us and the key issues of pharisaism and extremism. I have a New Year's resolution for Mr. Teratogen the Sinner: He should pick up a book before he jumps to the postmodernist conclusion that unimaginative segregationists make the best scout leaders and schoolteachers. Many people are shocked when I tell them that the trouble with such intellectually challenged, pathological brigands is that they intend to use absenteeism as a more destructive form of cronyism. And I'm shocked that so many people are shocked. You see, I had thought everybody already knew that my motivations for writing this letter are not of insult or hatred, but of the deepest love for mankind and the truest concern for its future generations -- and Mr. Teratogen the Sinner knows it. It's easy enough to hate him any day of the week on general principles. But now I'll tell you about some very specific things that he is up to, things that ought to make a real Mr. Teratogen the Sinner-hater out of you. First off, I challenge him to point out any text in this letter that proposes that doing the fashionable thing is more important than life or liberty. It isn't there. There's neither a hint nor a suggestion of such a thing. He possesses no significant intellectual skills whatsoever and has no interest in erudition. Heck, he can't even spell or define "erudition", much less achieve it. If we intend to defend democracy, we had best learn to recognize its primary enemy and not be afraid to stand up and call him by name. That name is Mr. Teratogen the Sinner.

[lizzytysh]

And all I've done is scroll.

I'll read later ~ when I have time .


You're so committed, Paula H !


~ Lizzy

[Donna.M]

Lizzytysh wrote

"You're so committed Paula H !"

I read a little something in my local London paper I would like to share with you all here.

'A woman was arrested on the London
Underground today.
It is supposed, Paula Hansen, a
plain,dumpy woman,
Left the train at the stop before her usual
station of Upney when she
noticed a man behaving strangely.
It is then beleived the man opened his
raincoat, thus exposing his genitals
to her.
Mrs Hansen was so shocked she had a
stroke.
At the same time, British Rail Police
Officers who had been hiding in nearby bushes,
pounced on the flasher who was
later identified as Mr Bertram Anorak of
Acacia Avenue, Putney,and had no choice but
to arrest Mrs Hansen for sexual assault as they
had witnessed her stroking Mr Anorak.
Mrs Hansen was in a distressed state by the
time they reached Dock Green Police Station,
Witnesses say she was mis-quoting Bible Scriptures
in a very agitated manner.
Mrs Hansen then bit the Divisional Surgeon on his testicles
and was detained for 28 day's supervision under the Mental Health Act
of 1969'

Taken from todays copy of the Evening Stundard - Do you think it coud be the same Paula Hansen who posts here?

Lizzytysh dear, you could be right - Paula H really is 'Committed'

Donna

[lizzytysh]

Oh, dear ~ I haven't even had the chance to read her treatise, and already it's a done deal .

I'll get back with you on my suspicions of identity. So far, it seems fingerprints will be superfluous. We'll still have to go through the motions, though, as false accusations are just so tedious.

I appreciate your keeping up with the news, Donna. Perhaps, you'd like to visit our new, crime lab one day, and see how these matters get pursued.


~ Lizzy

[Tim]

... should be committed, anyway.

And before anyone thinks 'Paula Hansen' is particularly original or clever in her rant, why not visit http://www.pakin.org/complaint/ and generate this sort of stuff for yourself?

[Kevin W.M.LastYearsMan]

Jesus Christ.
I have no idea who Mr. Taratogen the sinner is, but that was an interesting read. Also, the thing about the woman of the same name biting someone's testicles was a funny punctuation to it.

[Teratogen]

i read that entire thing. i had just a few responses... but after realizing that crazy bitch wasn't a human thesaurus i took up the link provided by tim. i was wondering if she wrote out "mr. teratogen the sinner" every time it was said and why there was no jesus-freak talk in there. hahahahahaha. it gives you options of having 1, 2, 3, 5, or 10 paragraphs for the complaint letter. take a look... this one has 10.

this only leads me to believe that it IS michael, or perhaps some asshole who noticed some crazy bitch named paula hansen in the newspaper and decided to use the name. anyhow, i still think it's mike. this has got me rollin', man!



you heard it, folks! straight from the mouth of the self-righteous! MR. TERATOGEN THE SINNER IS THE SOLE CAUSE FOR THE ENDTIMES!!!!

i vote YES, YOU ARE ALL MY CHILDREN. kinda like the american daytime soap opera, but more satanic.

[mickey_one]

Listen here Terry Wogan, what can I say, mate!


Well, I could say that Tim, you don't have to share something just because you know it. There is far too much emphasis in this world on being right. Winning is for Losers.


3 cheers for mysteries and intrigue even on a little local level. Boos and hisses for spoilers.


"It's Behind You!", "Oh no, it isn't" "Oh, yes it is"

[Teratogen]

the thing that gave it away for me was when "paula_hansen" called me terry wogan. the ONLY person to ever do that was you, michael. HAHAHA. i'm wondering how much time you spent coming up with a lot of that.

[Tim]

oh, boo hoo, did I spoil someone's little deceit? Well, tough, don't expect an apology. If people think it's clever to take a few seconds to type someone's name into a website and generate this stuff, so be it, but I reserve the right to point it out if I notice it.

I shouldn't even be in this part of the forum - but then, what did the original post have to do with 'Poetry and Music by the Forum members'? - so I'll leave you all to it, have fun boys and girls.

[mickey_one]

the thing that gave it away for me was when "paula_hansen" called me terry wogan. the ONLY person to ever do that was you, michael. HAHAHA. i'm wondering how much time you spent coming up with a lot of that.

damn, my man! you are too clever, how the hell will we find time at Berlin to discuss all this fun! you are coming, yeah? I haven't checked the list.

[mickey_one]

Tim wrote a shade defensively- oh, boo hoo, did I spoil someone's little deceit?


deceit, hmm. try to pick up the tone of a conversation before you join in. you may then choose not to stir unnecessarily.


Well, tough, don't expect an apology.

I don't expect one. I don't think it is your style. Anyway, this is trivia so don't worry.


If people think it's clever to take a few seconds to type someone's name into a website and generate this stuff, so be it, but I reserve the right to point it out if I notice it.

"I reserve the right"- wow, you do take this seriously, don't you.



I shouldn't even be in this part of the forum - but then, what did the original post have to do with 'Poetry and Music by the Forum members'? - so I'll leave you all to it, have fun boys and girls.

thanks, Pal. We normally do just that.

[Teratogen]

no, man, sadly i will not be joining you guys in berlin. i very much wanted to when i first heard of the plans, but things fell through. guess we'll see what happens in '08.

[Snow (retired)]

mickey_one insulted Tim by writing:
>try to pick up the tone of a conversation before you join in. you may then choose not to stir unnecessarily.


Do you think Tim's failure to pick up the conversation's tone was due to a genuine lack of social aptitude, or do you think he unconsciously held a deep personal resentment towards you that broke through his otherwise water-tight defences? By writing that Tim might choose not to stir unnecessarily you are strongly suggesting that he deliberately chose to evoke disruption. You are calling him a mischief-maker - an agitator. And I don't think that's a very nice thing to do.
g

[Young dr. Freud]

Anybody with any sense could tell right off the bat it was computer generated...I pity anyone who actually read the whole thing. Thanks Michael for another example of your "work." I always suspected that was the way you wrote your poems.


YdF