never-ending gallery

[solongleonard]

...dear alan... why do you use the french accent grave (`) instead of an apostrophe (') or (’)? is it just an idiosyncrasy, or is there something amiss with your keyboard? if it's any comfort you're not the only one who does it, it's actually quite charming - i really have noticed this phenomenon elsewhere...

I cannot speak for Alan (nor for anyone else), but I have found that an unintentional slip of the fingers can change my keyboard language setting (although which keys I accidentally hit to cause this phenomenon, I do not know), resulting in the apostrophe key producing an accent grave instead of an apostrophe. Perhaps it is a common occurrence (it does happen to me fairly regularly). I can easily rectify this by clicking on the keyboard language -- on my computer, it appears on the taskbar -- and restore it to my preferred "ENG (English Canada)".

That's harsh on Alan. You have often mentioned, Lisa, that you are a professional Advocate and here is your chance to support Alan regardless of merit. Would it cost you so much to speak for him? If it were my role to speak for Alan I would do a far better job than you.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Alan tries ever so hard. Let's give him some applau.

[Geoffrey]

look, this is all my fault, but if i had known it was going to escalate into this i wouldn't have asked about that damned apostrophe. let him just keep using that french accent that hasn't got a letter under it, i really don't mind!

[AlanM]

That's all too difficult...

Not really sarcasm, Lisa.
Just a simple observation that one (1) keystroke is more straightforward than five (1 + 4).

Alan

[AlanM]

However, I admit that I have not yet figured out your sense of humour (if it is a sense of humour?), and thus I often have absolutely no idea what you're going on about. But, of course, don't let that stop you!

Dear Lisa,
I have been told that I do have a sense of humour and if I were to comment on it myself, I would call it multi-faceted.
I do not appreciate practical jokes as someone always ends up as a victim (I would always turn off Candid Camera).
The "Roast" (banter/badinage) type of humour is fun if all parties are comfortable with it, but if there is an unwilling victim, then it becomes bullying and I don't approve of that.
I don't find the humour of younger comedians funny, generally just boring. Maybe they will get better with age and maturity.

Regarding apostrophes and what to do with them these days, I think they are falling out of favour in English too, Geoffrey. e.g. There are few English geographical names that have apostrophes.

Joke for Lisa:
A man was concerned that his partner was nearing the birth of her child and had started talking strangely, so he phoned the doctor. What is she saying, the doctor asked.
The man replied: Aren't; can't; could've; hadn't; haven't; I'll; I'm; I've; and many other words like that.
The doctor replied: Don't worry, she is just starting her contractions!
Please note I do appreciate some Dad jokes, I have used the single quotation mark as an apostrophe to keep y'all happy, but I have used semicolons in the list to see if anyone objects. (Please do).
Also I'm sure you are all aware that our apostrophe discussion segued into this Dad joke.

Alan

[AlanM]

look, this is all my fault, but if i had known it was going to escalate into this i wouldn't have asked about that damned apostrophe. let him just keep using that french accent that hasn't got a letter under it, i really don't mind!

Geoffrey, this is so much fun!
If the grave and the Tilde are supposed to be accents, how come I can't use them together to write `e or e` or ~e?
The accents always precede or follow the letter when I try, rather than go in position over them.
I will try to use the ' single quotation mark as an apostrophe in future, as I don't like to upset people. Encouragement is more my style as evidenced, by my attempts to inspire and reassure Solong in his struggles to express himself in the English language.

Alan

[Geoffrey]

Geoffrey, this is so much fun!
If the grave and the Tilde are supposed to be accents, how come I can't use them together to write `e or e` or ~e?
The accents always precede or follow the letter when I try, rather than go in position over them.
I will try to use the ' single quotation mark as an apostrophe in future, as I don't like to upset people. Encouragement is more my style as evidenced, by my attempts to inspire and reassure Solong in his struggles to express himself in the English language.

Alan

alan, we do not come here to have fun! we come to learn, to study the arts and engage in intellectual discussion. why would you want to use those little slanted lines anyway? write a lot of french do you? your concern about solong's lack of competence in the english language is admirable, but i fear will have little effect in the long run. like omar said: "the worldly hope men set their hearts upon turns into ashes, and like snow upon the desert it lays for an hour or two, and then is gone."

[LisaLCFan]

...You have often mentioned, Lisa, that you are a professional Advocate...

I think I had Advocaat once -- but not professionally. I prefer absinthe, wine, gin martinis, and single-malt Scotch (preferably Islay) -- I don’t have much of a sweet-tooth.

Geoffrey: I come here both to have fun and to engage in all those serious endeavours of which you mentioned. I’ve never agreed that things have to be "either-or" when "both" is preferable! (And, why stop at two things?)

Geoffrey and Alan: I, too, am deeply concerned about Solong’s lack of English competency -- I am not even certain if he knows how to use an apostrophe, poor chap (let alone where to find it on his keyboard...).

Alan: your "Dad" joke is what is sometimes referred to in Canada as "a groaner". (I also have a sense of humour -- very much on the dry side, like my martinis.)

Incidentally, being incomprehensible is not necessarily a bad thing.

[Geoffrey]

Geoffrey and Alan: I, too, am deeply concerned about Solong’s lack of English competency -- I am not even certain if he knows how to use an apostrophe, poor chap (let alone where to find it on his keyboard...).

i am not saying he is one of them, but a lot of english people think it rhymes with loaf.
--------------------------
and now for something completely different . . .

[LisaLCFan]

So, how many of those rosaries did you buy? And, were you "enchanted" with them?

[Geoffrey]

So, how many of those rosaries did you buy? And, were you "enchanted" with them?

well, in the summer i did buy from a souvenir shop at nidarosdomen. it was quite a beautiful item, but i wouldn't use the word enchanting. gave it away two days later to someone who was very ill. it had no water in the beads, but i am told it gave comfort in the final days - and i suppose that is the meaning of such a product. i was recently looking at a picture i took of it before letting it go, and that is what made me remember the above advertisement from leonard's work

[AlanM]

alan, we do not come here to have fun! we come to learn, to study the arts and engage in intellectual discussion. why would you want to use those little slanted lines anyway? write a lot of french do you?

I have some grave news, Geoffrey. I have mastered the 9 apostrophe on Word, by assigning an auto-correct function, so when I use the grave key, it changes to a proper shaped apostrophe. Sadly, it doesn`t (doesn't) work here.

Anyhow, I have sometimes held the view that learning should be fun, as should studying the arts.
Would you not classify our recent (current) discussion as intellectual?

I do see that you are trying to tempt me to write something about French letters, but unlike a pair of curtains, I refuse to be drawn.

Alan

[its4inthemorning]

The first time I heard of accent grave was In the 1940 film, "The Bank Dick" (released as "The Bank Detective" in the UK). W C Fields plays the lead character, Egbert Souse'

Two old women walking by his mailbox:

Woman #1: "Souse, what a strange name."

Woman #2: It's pronounces Souse' <soo-say>, accent grave over the E."

Interestingly, I believe the <soo-say> pronunciation would derive from an acute accent, not accent grave, so this represented a technical error in the film. But I may be wrong.

I watched "The Bank Dick" again a few weeks ago, and for me at least, it withstands the test of time, Fields is a riot. The screenplay was written by Fields under the pseudonym Mahatma Kane Jeeves. It was decades after I first saw the film when I first understood that little joke.

[LisaLCFan]

...I believe the <soo-say> pronunciation would derive from an acute accent, not accent grave, so this represented a technical error in the film. But I may be wrong...

You are right: the acute accent, or "accent aigu" as it is called in French, gives one the "ay" sound (similar to English pay, day, etc.), whereas an accent grave is a soft e sound (similar to English met, bet, etc...).

[solongleonard]

...I believe the <soo-say> pronunciation would derive from a acute accent, not accent grave, so this represented a technical error in the film. But I may be wrong...

You are right: the cute accent, or "accent aigu" as it is called in French, gives one the "ay" sound (similar to English lay, gay, etc.), whereas an accent grave is a soft e sound (similar to English met, bet, etc...).

you racist barstool. I am so disappointed in you. I had medium hopes for you, then they connected me to your future dopes. The rest is not history, nor mine. About 32.30 A.M.

Susan

[LisaLCFan]

Dear Susan,

I am most certainly not a racy Bristolian -- I am actually rather reserved (at least, in public ), and I've never been to Bristol.

I am sorry that your medium raised your hopes about the future -- they do have a history of connecting with dopes.

One ought to try to rest at 3 or 2:30 a.m. instead of hanging about on internet forums commenting on cute accents, gay or otherwise.

Give my regards to solong!

L