Birthday poem late in coming

[Taigaku]

I used Leonard's song "Dear Heather" as my paradigmatic text.
I became a member of this forum on his birthday last year - my first posting was a birthday poem. This year I had no words on that particular date, but I figure I'm forgiven...

So, in honor of the man and his work, of his words and his silence, here it is:


Dear Leonard

Dear Leonard
Please say it again
With a voice tuned in to silence
And your words all black
From the writing

[Makera]

Ooh, great mood and image, Uwe!

Very fitting, for the enigmatic, paradigmatic poet himself.

Actually reminds me of the Moody Blues' song, "The Voice":

"Ooh, won't you tell me again....
The one that is calling is you"

~ Makera

[LaurieAK]

This is a really nice piece. I love the simplicity and tone. Part of me wants to alter the line endings and caps. Please indulge me

Dear Leonard

Dear Leonard
Please say it
Again
With a voice tuned in
To silence
And your words
all Black
From the writing

I think i prefer to see this broken up as above. But what do i know??!!!

Thanks for sharing,
Laurie

[Taigaku]

Oh, I agree about breaking up the lines - something like what you suggest would be my normal choice.
But I wanted this to mirror the form of "Dear Heather", so I used the same number of lines...

Thanks for commenting!

[lizzytysh]

Very lovely, Taigaku. It's good to see you here. I'm sorry you missed Leonard's birthday, but happy that you belatedly are wishing him well , and more writing.

~ Elizabeth

[Taigaku]

Thank you, Elizabeth

All love

~Uwe