This Race This World (The Man and The Woman)

[Alsiony]

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[Cate]

When you kiss her war-torn stomach

This was my favourite line. I think that this is a vulnerable area for women and kisses here are especially intimate and convey, at least to me, a feeling of being ‘loved’.

When you glide your mind
Across her mystery,
When you taste her tears of joy,
When you kiss her war-torn stomach,
Bury your industry in her sweetest smell
And delight in her sex
Why is it? -
That every time
A later hindsight
Produces the illusion
That it was all just simply
An intoxicating dream?

a very sensual and strong stanza that fits well a part of the poem but could easily stand on it's own. I liked the suggestion that the illusion was in fact, the belief that the love in that specific moment and place, was merely a dream.

[Alsiony]

Thanks Cate

I guess the parallels (for want of a better word) are obvious in this really - it's not supposed to be sad or depressing - just an observation etc...
There are two different stories going on in it - but both stories are the same in principle.
It's quite narrow minded in some respects...
well anyhows - thanks for commenting

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[Cate]

I guess the parallels (for want of a better word) are obvious in this really

Do you mean in that both of these people are being guiding by what may be their natural instincts/predispositions?

[Alsiony]

Yes – basically that, in terms of the man/woman as presented here. There has always been some kind of Venus/Mars thing (one easy way of putting it) – I think it's impossible to suggest otherwise.

But parallels isn't quite the right word because although the two themes here – a relationship between Men and Women, and a relationship between Mankind and the Earth – are parallel in a multitude of ways- they are far too connected (to me) to be just simply running alongside eachother. They are the same thing in many ways. In this way you could say that this poem is very down on Men, that's what I meant by narrow minded really, but it's just one of the ways that the general relationship between Men and Women can play out – of course it's not an all encompassing picture. Romance can sometimes seem like a holiday away from reality- shame! But then I can be a silly old romantic type so I would say that! Haha. And besides – it's not as if there are no Women who see things like the man in this poem either, and romance is not all that there is ofcourse – but the spirit of it can sometimes die far too prematurely in my opinion.
Equally, the other story here – Mankind's relationship with this planet that he is born of- of course this includes Womankind – it's humanity in general, and in that sense I am referring to many things,(without getting tangled up in patriarchal society and all that). For instance - how we may step out of our industrialised self created worlds – say, go on holiday, take time out to go to the mountains or whatever – and suddenly we feel 'at home' there, we may feel something special stirred within us, some kind of peace, some kind of connection - but instead of treating 'the romance' of that situation as real - we treat is as a holiday, then go back to our daily lives as if that is reality – madness really!

I was trying to bring the two together – and the line that you picked up on about war-torn stomach, is a very feminine one – the Earth, war-torn and damaged by humanity, but also how a Man cannot always seem to naturally find it in himself to really be able to appreciate what it is that Women really go through in our share of things. Stomach is a very vulnerable place to a Woman indeed, and metaphorically – and literally speaking – when a Woman lets a Man kiss her war-torn stomach, she may well be praying against him letting her down in the future, but despite this - she will still let him into her, into everything that she is, because she loves him. Again – I have presented this argument from just one point of view I know.

People go on holiday and mentally kiss the landscape and praise it – but it does not stop them from further hurting and abusing it. It's the nature of being human.
So, also from a Mother-Earth point of view – that is why I split the poem into roles of gender – both stories are the same on different scales - it just worked better that way in terms of structure as well.

Yes! I do fall into that category of people who believes that humanity is damaging the planet to an extent that it shouldn't and can't cope with! But I don't need to be struck down with science – because a lot of what I think includes that too.
To me - it's fundamentally clear as day – just very very basic common sense, you can't just take take take, and you can't just fill the wounds that you create with rubbish and expect everything to be ok. Same with people.
Though I do understand that I may utterly wrong about it all - It's just how it feels to me!

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[Cate]

I'm glad that I asked that question Clare, I was still on the surface of your poem pondering a specific though.
Although I had made the connection of the earth being a woman, I hadn't gone the other way to see that the woman could represent the earth and was only seeing the story of the man and the woman.

[Teratogen]

How much of my poem have you been studying??????

[Alsiony]

Thanks Cate - I know I have explained a bit of it, I know its not really necessary, in a way I guess. It's up to the person reading it as to what they see, so I don't mean it in a dictatorial sense if I ever do say what I mean - ya know? I sometimes wonder if I go into things too much - but I am an habitual stay up til 3am talking kinda person, so I guess that's where it stems from haha!

T - are you asking in relation to my poem here?
I'd put this one in my facebook notes a while ago - did you not see it there?

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[Alsiony]

How much of my poem have you been studying??????

Oh I see what you mean - no you are more than alright there - I far and away believe that I wrote my poem first
- dim problemau
I posted it in my notes on the 13th, but wrote it a while before that.

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