The Stairs Hid Themselves

[Atom Heart]

The Stairs Hid Themselves
There are no ladies in-waiting
on the roof of the Wrecking Guild Headquarters
so I'll prance to a wirring weathervane
and dance by myself
in the waning moon of the Norse-blooded.

And I'll shout at the stretch car driver
parked in the alley of boy-girl passions
to hang the keys on the cemetary monument
and draw a warm bath
for his children asleep in the trunk.

[lizzytysh]

Hi Atom ~

There's an almost netherworld thread of darkness and shadow that weaves its way through your poetry. A very interesting effect. Somehow gothic.

~ Lizzy

[Atom Heart]

Do these effects render some sort of longing inside of you?

And do you think this is any good (the poem)?

[lizzytysh]

Hi Atom ~

Gee, no, it doesn't really render longing. I just find it very interesting. You'll rarely [never?] see me here calling a poem 'good' ~ but I will say what it is I like/don't like about it, in specifics.

First, I like your title. I also like the images in your first verse. The second verse seems to have you looking down from the roof to the scene below. It's all an eerie scene, somehow; particularly with the image of the children in the trunk. However, I still like it.

~ Lizzy

[Atom Heart]

Have you any poems here?

[lizzytysh]

No ~ I know better .

Actually, in my entire life, I've written fewer than 10 of anything that might be considered a poem. Actually, again, I just remembered...there is one, which I wrote at age eight. So you don't need to go looking, it won't be a problem to repeat it for you here :

"Time for tarry,
Time for play,
None have I,
This busy day."

A real poet-in-the-making, eh ? Not bad for a tombstone, however . Sorta zen-existential [tee-hee].

[LaurieAK]

Hi Atom Heart~

I don't understand your poem.

Why "norse" blood?

The title's connection eludes me.

For such a stark poem, it seems "Wrecking Guild Headquarters" would have a starring role in what is going on...But i don't see it.

And the ending. Shocking and attention grabbing...but i don't understand the message you are trying to convey.

It would be great if you could explain what i am missing. Blame my density and not your poem.

Thanks,
Laurie

[Atom Heart]

The term "Wrecking Guild Headquarters" simply refers to a brothel; "Wrecking" as in home-wrecker.

Perhaps now the other pieces will fall together.

Except for the title, which actually could mean several things...