From Graves Exhumed the Stars Bewildered

[Teratogen]

From Graves Exhumed the Stars Bewildered

I thought I saw you
this afternoon.
It could have been
you.
Maybe it was you,
maybe
it wasn’t.
I was stopped
at a left-turn light
and a car that looked like yours
came from around the corner
on the street
opposite me,
going the direction
I just came from.
She was blond—
hair was just a bit longer than
I remember—
the car was red,
she had glasses on;
everything that instantly,
instantly
brought you back into
my mind.

At that moment
I felt
the cosmos disintegrate
in my veins
and the universe fold
from within my stomach
and the galaxy of thought imploded,
bewildered stars
exhuming themselves from
the graves in my mind;
the ghosts of a
forlorn
wonder that once
filled my heart.
Yes, that’s what it was like—
seeing a ghost.

It wasn’t about results
then.
I hadn’t thought of all the
“what-if’s” and “why-would-she’s.”
No, just seeing
that girl’s face—your face—
just acted as a
reminder
of the joy I
once experienced,
the excitement of your company I
once longed for,
and that beautiful smile that
brought me
to my knees.

The fool, they say,
will always return
to folly.
Perhaps I’m a fool—
I’m quite certain that I am.
Quite certain…
but that could either mean
that I never learn,
or that my trusting heart
can never be quelled.
Perhaps it’s a character flaw.
Perhaps
it’s a refreshing human trait
most people rarely
(if ever) show.
I’m quite certain of my
foolhardy ways regardless.

But there you went;
it only took a matter of seconds
to drive past me
and make me continuously
wonder, and wander
in those infinite depths
of curiosity.
I could be wrong, but
I thought I saw
an immense shadow cast
upon the road
from an inconsequential little
smile,
coming thirty miles an hour
around the turn.
I’m afraid
the rest of the day
won’t have the strength to
support me
with the weight of that image on
my mind.

Maybe it wasn’t her.