The Well

[George.Wright]

A single horseman stood
along the craggy skyline
above the enchanted wood
like a sentinel of the divine

and he stood guard over the well
entrance covered with ice and snow
somewhere you could never tell
where the end of the rainbow does go

and the moon was full and pregnant
and the atmosphere and air was cold and stagnent
and a sliver of bloodied wood did pierce the ice
a sado-torture conception to pay the price

and the devils rolled the lucky dice
gambling has a very unnerving device
if we have money for the crops or the rice
the arm is eager for the fatal slice

and the well crackled slightly open
and the devils were rolling and hoping
that no-one would see into the waters
that they transformed into two beautiful daughters

and a confused youth found the well
the daughters did kiss and try and drag him to hell
but he was longing and thirsting for questions about life
he ignored the daughters and knowledge was his wife

Georges

Copyright: George Wright 2004

[lizzytysh]

I really like the mythical, fairytale aspect of this, particularly the first and last verses ~ and a great, last line and ending .

In the last verse, second line, I'd change the second "and" [following "try"] to the word "to". Without renovation, you're going to end up with repetition of either "and" or "to," anyway, and at least changing your second "and" to "to" would make it proper grammar.

[George.Wright]

Thanks for your comments, Liz.
Georges