The Aroma, The Scent

[carm]

Orchard white peony, buoyant,
displaced leaves composed
on a swampy bed of brown.

Herbaceous, yet luscious,
bringing solace to a moment,
but then what good is it?

[jabble524]

What you have now is good, but it feels like it needs to be expanded on, I was starting to get into it, then it ended.

[carm]

jabble524, Thank you for your interest towards the few lines offered up here, in the form of a poem…

I hadn't intended to further its thought. But now, perhaps it is worth my while.

I will see what I can do.

carm

[carm]

Orchard white peony, buoyant,
displaced leaves composed
on a swampy bed of brown.

Herbaceous, yet luscious,
bringing solace to a moment
but then what good is it?

Intriguing, baited aromas,
juxtaposed one to the other
the guest, the host.

Beautiful, saying nothing,
dreams of rose and white
caress thy slumbering soul.

[jabble524]

I like what you have added. The image of caressing the slumbering soul is really powerful.

[carm]

I like what you have added. The image of caressing the slumbering soul is really powerful.

When new vitality is drawn into the unconscious slumbering soul, it can be such a graceful warrior.