I Spy

Pete · Post by **Pete** » Tue Jan 27, 2004 1:37 am

Paula!!
You asked if there was a cup for High Spyer.
The answer is yes

Pete

Pete · Post by **Pete** » Tue Jan 27, 2004 2:04 am

Job description and duties.
To be negotiated according to the strengths of the successful applicant.
The immediate line manager will be Commander (MIS) and both commanders will be answerable to BC.
Possible duties will include;
award points when work load becomes excessive
investigating complaints of allocation of points
mediating in disputes of more serious nature
making coffee
locking up at the end of each day
deputising for Commander (MIS) when he is on leave..happens to be next week for 2 days..that will be a true test of the newly appointed commander.

The new commander will not be allowed to add up points. That remains the sole duty of Commander (MIS) who likes adding up..and sometimes taking away

Any interested applicants must state their interest and follow it up with a statement (in no more than 50 words) explaining why they think they would be suitable for the job. In case a tie break is needed they will also need to award what they think is a suitable number of points for a particular I Spy.

The company operates a good pension scheme and health care insurance.

Canvassing disqualifies.

and those waiting for points for recent I Spys will have to wait a bit longer!!!!!

Pete

Byron · Post by **Byron** » Tue Jan 27, 2004 2:13 am

Well I can recommend a very good lady for the above post. In fact she's been tried in every position in the office (topical or what

) and has been found to be best on the counter. When she was in charge of the Cemeteries and Crematorium Department, she made great savings by introducing skeleton staffing at the weekends, thus saving the Corporation loads a' money. "I'll get me coat...."

lizzytysh · Post by **lizzytysh** » Tue Jan 27, 2004 2:34 am

Aha! He's talking about you, Jo.....better get going on that 50 words [or more

] ~ I return to my original statement, Pete, gotta love ya'

! ....And, she makes the meanest cup o' coffee in the South

! With her sleeping habits, she can also be on the job 24/7, if need be, to cover all hemispheres.......I nominate [drum roll]......JO!!! Do I hear a Second? Byron

??? Oh, that's right, we're not canvassing...or nominating...or whatever

!?! Jo, if you wanna get started and need some help editing your final draft, I'll be more than happy to help!

Helven · Post by **Helven** » Tue Jan 27, 2004 2:40 am

Oh, dear Elizabeth

,

Thank you so much for the explanations! I really appreciate them – and I appreciate very much your friendship and your kind attitude towards me!!!
And, you know, I not always know how to accept compliments and how to pay compliments… so this message is much shorter than I’d like it to see… but just thank you

!

Love

,
Tanya.

lizzytysh · Post by **lizzytysh** » Tue Jan 27, 2004 2:45 am

Dear Tanya ~

You're welcome, my dear friend

. You deserve to know where my head and heart were at, when my words went down as they did. Others who might not know, I feel need to, for fairness and understanding. I value you

.

Love

,
Elizabeth

Jo · Post by Jo » Tue Jan 27, 2004 5:54 pm

I met my old lover on the street last night. He took me to his house for refreshments. As he seductively forced the juicy pulp through my lips he said "These oranges come all the way from China - they're not the cramped little rejects we get after the good stuff's been exported to Europe."

Being a married woman (and a mistress to boot) I said "I have no love to give you, the little that I had to start with has been dissipated on the issue of my loins and a few other ne'er-do-wells" to which he responded "But you've got me on your wavelength, I listen to your radio show every week"

I was overwhelmed and from my overflowing river of emotion I answered "You've always been my lover, I have a vivid imagination and former delights live with me forever". He puffed up with pride and exclaimed "I know this sounds half-crazy but I want to spend the night beside you - I feel light as a breeze and I could walk upon the water."

"My sailor!" I cried out "Let us sail on, silver moon before us, across the river dark until we reach the cave at the tip of the lily. Show me what I only know the limits of - take me across the border where we will not be cautioned to surrender to jealous spouses and ex-lovers. I want to travel with you and I want to travel blind - I certainly don't want to see those camp little drowning men lusting after what you don't go home with."

"We don't need a skeleton crew" he replied "I'm your man."

"We'll dance to the end of love" I wailed, "in a room where the moon has been sweating and you will let me see your naked body when I bring you wine and bread."

So I thank you for your vote of confidence, Lizzy, and I do feel greatly honoured, but due to circumstances and previous commitments, not to mention pressures in unmentionable places, I regret that I am unable to accept your nomination.

We're getting ready to take Manhattan, then we'll take Berlin.

lizzytysh · Post by **lizzytysh** » Tue Jan 27, 2004 7:17 pm

Well, you're gonna give the scorekeeper a fit with this

.....I'm happy to report that the newly-available position remains vacant

!

Cia · Post by **Cia** » Tue Jan 27, 2004 9:50 pm

Jo, I spy's have to be real and not just dreams

Pete, you can't give Jo points for this - she is just pulling your leg

hugs from Cia

p.s.: something you forgot to tell me Jo???

Jo · Post by Jo » Tue Jan 27, 2004 11:19 pm

I have one word for all you doubting Thomases: extrapolation.

There's enough truth in there - albeit enhanced by artistic licence - so you can come and reward me, Pete: just send me the monkey and the plywood violin.

Helven · Post by **Helven** » Wed Jan 28, 2004 12:05 am

Ha, ha, ha! I’ve done that! – I’ve burnt down a violin

! I’ve reduced it to ashes! And, of course, I saw it burning.

Though, before burning down I sketched it with a pen and paper

… But it still was a violin; at least, it looked like that. And it burnt.
I tried so hard to think out how much points I’d like to get for that feat but the task was too difficult as I tried to not deprive myself of my due share and, at the same time, to be not too greed

. I didn’t succeed. I can say only that I don’t pretend, of course, to that big bonus as a violin wasn’t “original”. But since it still was rather real and quite visible I think I can get something (plus some points for ingenuity

).

Pete · Post by **Pete** » Wed Jan 28, 2004 12:12 am

Linmag
You may have your 50 points for 'standing by the window'.
You were patient and have thus been awarded

The schedule.......now what shall we do here?? You have 70 points, but I .........hey!! just as I type this I hear the word schedule on the tv (Synchronicity rules OK!! see separate thread)...it is a sign that you must have the extra 20 points. You have synchronicity on your side!!!!

Helven
You are on a winning streak......20 points for your good self. Your bad self does not get any points and thats how it should be

Margaret
breaks of dawn ..4 in the morning...night and days...ring my bells....ring my bells?? ..is this an attempt at bribery for more points??.. I'll presume not..trains ... quite a collection here. I know how genuine all these I Spys are and 60 points are yours.

Witty Owl
who do you address?.. rhetorical question!!..hero's..seaweeds..sun pouring down like honey..secret life (tell us about it sometime!!!

).. moved across the border...shouldn't you have poured across the border..you are becoming a little careless there. Please be more careful in the future.

. This old banjo!!! a little friendly advice coming up...... forget it

Points? 55..if I had gone with the syc approach you would have got 2167 points there because that's what I just heard on the TV....but I Spying is an exact science so we'll stick with the 55... but one more mention of the banjo and I'm afraid a verbal warning will be issued

Cia
absolute control is what you are starting to have on BC. He was absolutely overwhelmed with your greensleeves.
I have seen him underwhelmed and I have seen him whelmed but I have never seen him overwhelmed and for that alone you must be in receipt of 90 points..such creativity on your behalf which other I Spyers would do best to try to imitate..

which leads me to Jo...

Jo
Cia succinctly provides a concise, brief, yet powerful I Spy and you go overboard just like someone who has walked the plank.
At first reading I was totally impressed with your recent I Spys and was ready to award 370 points but fortunately I had to go and cook dinner for BC and when I returned Cia had made me stop in my tracks. What a dilemma I have..who shall I turn to..BC is now sleeping after his hearty meal of faggots and mushy peas and I must not disturb his slumbers.
Mistress?? I have valued your advice throughout this journey and now, as never before in the history of I Spying, I need guidance beyond guidance.

Jo talks of extrapolation and Cia of pulling legs. There is little difference between the two but there now needs to be definition that decides the path Jo has chosen in order to gain loads and loads of points on top of the many, many points she has already accrued. I must maintain my impartiality here so please ignore the last sentence..the last sentence being the previous one and not the last one which will be written in this post.
Jo, I so want to believe that you have seen all of these but I have no monkey (they're all busy typing Shakespeare) or plywood violin to send you.

I await a sign

pete

Pete · Post by **Pete** » Wed Jan 28, 2004 12:18 am

I smell a burning violin....

I just posted and Helven's message was there, unseen before I posted....it must be a sign!!

But I know not what it tells me.

pete

BTW Helven I think 180 points are in order. A real violin burning would have gained you 380 points but this is still an excellent I Spy. We salute you.

Jo · Post by Jo » Wed Jan 28, 2004 1:09 am

Pete if you allow these bureaucrats to con you into denying me points on veracity then at least allow me points for creative-stringing-together.

I wish to nominate Lizzy for the vacant position. Her sparkling wit, humour and loquacity will fill it nicely and she has amply proved her competence on innumerable critical occasions... and besides, she's my friend and she knows what everybody knows - that there were so many people I just had to meet.

... and she believes me (she has inside information)

lizzytysh · Post by **lizzytysh** » Wed Jan 28, 2004 9:08 am

My Dear Mistreusse ~

I'm sorry to take so long to get to you. I've been traveling night and day, but now that I'm here, let's step over to the side to talk. It'll only take a minute. I must be brief, as it's far past my bedtime

. However, you know you are a priority.

[I guess the best way is to take it from the top. I feel it's important to follow the inherent rules of the game we're playing, as suggested by its name, that being of course, I Spying. Well, a derivative, thereof, anyway

. As much as I love my dear friend, Jo, and I do; I feel we have to uphold the standards of the game. 'We' did not allow Tchocolatl her flights of fancy. Unless we want to change the game to I Think, or I Write, then we really have to disqualify the elements ~ that'll take some sorting

~ of Jo's stream-of-Leonard-consciousness that she has not actually witnessed. It is certainly admirable thinking and writing, on her part, to bring all that phrasing together into a cohesive, short story of sorts....however, that just isn't the assignment here. If you let it go, as though they were all 'normal' [as you can get, for this crew] observations, then we're going to end up with one flock after another of writing exercises being submitted for points. The slight turn of perspective that results in some/nay, many of the endearing, I Spying citings is still very much encouraged, of course! I feel some points are in order for Jo's very humourous items that she sent you, and that she will rightfully own, her sense of truth and honesty surely still being intact.

Now, with regard to Helven's very clever and ingenious I Create / I Burn / I Spy.....well, you just have to admit that she put a lot of thought and work into sighting one burning violin

. However, I also feel it's crucial that we halt further Creatings and Spyings. Otherwise, all the I Spyers will end up with sketchbooks in their hands, attempting to draw every lyric and line they come across, just to claim a sighting

. Just too prohibitive. For her originality, I feel we owe her a one-time award of points. However, with that award comes the retirement of her technique. I believe these were the only issues of contention, right? If not, I'll certainly find out tomorrow, after a short night's sleep. I hope I've been of help.]

Goodnite, My Mistreusse.....

~ La Mistress