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Good Morning all, I recently received next week a confidential email from Sir Geoffers Wren pleading with me to acclaim his excellent Gallery thread as the most popular on this forum. "Dear Lord Solong, I beg beg plead plead ask ask request beg implore explore you to help me"

I can not do that. Statistics expose his hollow clam and I don't have the molluscs to drown the truth.

His Scullery thread receives an average of one response per 112 views. 67,600 divided by 599. This shows, magnum conclusivnum, how little interest it creates.

By stunning contrast Captain James O'Connell in his superb thread Crimplene is receiving an average of one response per 44 views. 1065 divided by 24. This stunning victory may, of course, be due to Lisa LC Hairdryer''s hi jack of that thread.

Hi Jack, we miss you. The British poster Lazari UK, holds the record for the lowest response to any poster's efforts. He has started 843,006 different threads in the last year with statistics of an average 2.7 views per century and a response rate of 0.00000000001 which happened when he himself once typed "hello, hello 1 2 3 testing, is this damn thing turned on?".

To be fair to Jack, as I suppose we must, he did have a minor hit in the 1920's with his Autobiographical song "My Name is Jack" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6C7rxhIpXW4

" and my name's Jack
and I live in the back of the Greta Garbo home for wayward boys and girls"

These statistics are presented by the Trump "Corona will be over by tomorrow, it's a Beautiful Beautiful thing" Royal Academy of Jack the Lademy.

Corrections are unwelcome. Trespassers will be shot. Has anyone got the lyrics to Tacoma Trailer?

solongleonard wrote: ↑Sat Apr 04, 2020 9:27 am ...Captain James O'Connell in his superb thread Crimplene is receiving an average of one response per 44 views....

Does it count when most of the views and the responses are by one and the same person?

Geoffrey is my friend!! His visits are as valuable as anybody's. Deep and big shame on you to even doubt their numerical value. Geoffrey pops in so often to your and Jimmy's Fred to learn, to ponder if he could replicate Jimmy's success. But he needs what is known in the trade as a SUBMARINE (successful unique bullshit marketing and raunchy individualistic nirvana ecstasy) to make his own Fred noticed. Indeed, you might think it a sweet gesture to turn life on its head and see if you can find his! It's worth a glance. It is effectively a Tribute Gallery to Mohammed Ali and none the worse for its lack of connection with Leonard Cohen. It reminds me a little of the enigmatic posts today with 3 sweet introductions to songs by the Seekers.

So my advice to you is support Geoffrey! Would you like me to make an introduction by email? You 2 will get on well despite him being English and you American. I look benignly on you both from my Norwegian mountain, the world is wonderful these days so I can "a fjord" to do so, as we Norse folk say.

Who is this "Godfrey" person you keep mentioning? Is he a member of this forum? The name doesn't ring a bell.

LisaLCFan wrote: ↑Sat Apr 04, 2020 11:17 pm Who is this "Godfrey" person you keep mentioning? Is he a member of this forum? The name doesn't ring a bell.

Ring the Geoff that still can ring
He doesn’t play, he doesn’t sing
But he can put Ali on the canvas every time
A pugilist so sublime

I still can't place this "Geoffery"
Nor recall a gallery
Let alone an M. Ali
Is this just a fantasy
Full of rhyming misery?

Geography has long hair
great geezer
gallery is a boat that slaves row
Mali is his best pali
Fantasy is way better than real life
obviously
I like words
different er ones and they can mean other things as well

Like many others perhaps, I have wasted this surprise holiday. I have not touched outstanding work nor even begun my Greek lessons yet. However, I have had a few moments when I have been fired up and I may yet write a poem, a giant step for me, a small step for mankind. I love writing but only banter mostly. I did walk Milo for an hour today. It was wonderful.

How are you doing, Lisa?

χαῖρε, Μιχαήλ! Τί πράττεις;

(That's Ancient Greek -- I don't know any modern Greek.)

My poetry is rubbish -- never my forte. Your wordplay is inspiring!

I went for a walk for an hour today, too. I am okay. Things are quiet and odd out there.

Nice to see you around here again, Mike!

LisaLCFan wrote: ↑Sun Apr 05, 2020 1:34 am χαῖρε, Μιχαήλ! Τί πράττεις;

(That's Ancient Greek -- I don't know any modern Greek.)

My poetry is rubbish -- never my forte. Your wordplay is inspiring!

I went for a walk for an hour today, too. I am okay. Things are quiet and odd out there.

Nice to see you around here again, Mike!

I answer your foreign language question. "Γράφω, πρώτη χαρά μου" The particular language I am failing to learn these days is Modern Greek.

Do not worry about your poetry. I think it will improve in a few years time when you are over forte.

On more serious matters - I challenge your claim also to have walked for an hour yesterday. I never saw you, not at all, not even a glimpse. I accordingly find your claim to be incredible.

However, leaving your naughty exercise fib to one side, it really is kind of you to compliment my writing.

Solong