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to the man that loves the quiet
Posted: Wed Jul 28, 2004 1:27 am
by Sandra
One day I will stop coming
And you will wonder
Where I am.
Silence will be all you get from me
Silence of words, silence of sounds
Silence of any possibility.
And then
you will know me completely.
The many sounds that once you heard from me
will turn into sun rays
in the great vasteness of space,
and I will be closer to you than ever.
Posted: Wed Jul 28, 2004 2:35 pm
by Midnight
Good!
Posted: Wed Jul 28, 2004 3:27 pm
by Arno
Even Better!!!
seriously, very very well written and moving.
take care
Arno
Posted: Wed Jul 28, 2004 7:54 pm
by Sandra
I am glad that you like it........thank you......
Posted: Wed Jul 28, 2004 10:31 pm
by margaret
well done Sandra !
Posted: Wed Jul 28, 2004 11:07 pm
by Kush
Very nice. I was a little mystified initially how sound would turn into light but I think the symbolic ambiguity of that idea works!!
Posted: Thu Jul 29, 2004 1:08 am
by lizzytysh
I wanted to comment on your poem when I first read it, but I couldn't formulate the words accurately, and I'm still tring to bring one in particular to mind.
You've poeticized love and loss very beautifully, Sandra. I love the way your poem [intentionally] shifts, with "And then" as the segue. I love the elusiveness of how you've expressed your thoughts. You've created a sense and visual of vitality and action, using the word and concept of silence, their virtual opposite.
And then [
the missing word ~ meaning something that's true, although its appearing to be the opposite] with your, "you will know me completely." It's not "ambivalence" or "ambiguity" ~ but it's right in there, somewhere close. Likewise, with these lines:
"in the great vasteness of space,
and I will be closer to you than ever."
I really, really like this, and it hearkens to feelings I've had, as well. You've expressed them incredibly succinctly, despite it's appearing to be otherwise
.
What is that
word!?!
~ Lizzy
Posted: Thu Jul 29, 2004 2:02 am
by margaret
one ness ? Time , space, sound, light all being as one ?
Posted: Thu Jul 29, 2004 4:09 am
by Sandra
There is a universal energy that joins us when someone is able to put into words ideas that touch different and far people in a same emotion.
It is as if we touch the same ring of a melody....thank you for the feedback....
Posted: Fri Jul 30, 2004 12:23 am
by Helven
Dear Sandra,
I never comment poems but now just can't but say something... won't "comment", though - I'd simply like to thank you for posting this. It's really wonerful! Thank you very much for sharing this amazing poem with everyone.
Yours,
TH.