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Violet,

Very compelling... and very creepy...

The unusual rhythm/line breaks underline this feeling – like someone breathing irregularly, whether with fear or excitement.

Violet

There is something very creepy about this... It made me go cold.

It conjurs up all manner of dark and macabre thoughts...

imaginary friend wrote
like someone breathing irregularly

I agree with this, It somehow made me out of breath just reading it...Is that what you were trying to achieve with the irregular word spacings?

Karren B
xx
(wishing she hadn't read it before bedtime!).

I'm assuming Constance died, and that he keeps this a secret, keeps her at home with him, lovingly replacing her clothing as it deteriorates, sewing bits of her clothing (and her?) together again. Creepy, yet with a sense of defiance – denial that death could take away someone who meant so much to him. Faithfulness (constance)... to a possessive, obsessive degree. He seems to relish going through the ordinary actions of life, interacting with others in a normal way while nursing his precious secret.

... Or did he kidnap her, keep her a secret prisoner, then eventually kill her, so that he could keep her forever? In which case all bets are off, and my old man is looking better by the minute!

How chilling!
I love the way that you have presented it - it really does give it a very real 'breathing' quality.
In the back of my mind it reminds me of a film, or something that I read, or something - I can't put my finger on it at the moment.

The more you read it- the more vivid it becomes... like a photograph slowly developing right before your eyes.

A
x

That was cleverly done Violet, the spacing draws you into his psyche,I got really involved in this poem.I was thinking to myself 'is he a bereft husband who cannot let go of his wife? or a serial killer who wants to absorb every detail of his victims demise and degeneration? Thank goodness it wasn't the serial killer V or I would have been a bit worried about you!

It reminded me of a book by Anne Rice when she wrote about a death of a loved one.This woman kept her husband's body in their bed and she was describing her feelings ,emotions, about her loss and his gradual decomposition.I found the book hard to read and I must admit I gave up on it.If I remember correctly it was about the loss she felt when she lost her daughter and how hard it is to let go.I can't remember the name of the book now even though I've searched Anne Rice's web site.

I have no qualifications on poetry so maybe I should not really comment on people's offerings here,but sometimes I feel that when I really like something I should say so,so I hope you don't mind me putting in my two cents worth as it were.

Excellently told Violet

I liked the repetition especially of the word Constance, which is a creepy sounding word - the vowel sounds and those slippery s sounds. The part that struck me as most disturbing was his desire to keep creating her and improve her not just maintain something/someone that he had lost
which made me think, that perhaps the loved one in question, may not have passed in the most natural of circumstances.

It's interesting what we're okay with and not okay with, what we can justify in our minds. I think sometimes thinking about what we ourselves could potentially be capable of is probably one of the most frightening things to think of. Today on CBC there was a woman who was discussing 'women who love men who kill' apparently these women are almost like groupies and these men receive all sorts of marriage proposals and offers to have babies by woman they've never even met.

x
cate

p.s. the spacing worked out very nicely - very effective, I liked how I.F. described it.