(UNTITLED...)
Posted: Sat Jan 09, 2010 12:58 pm
(Withdrawn for competition)
Alsiony
If you feel your poem is conveying the "simple truth " why not call it that. It's simple really
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Re: (UNTITLED...)
Posted: Sun Jan 10, 2010 6:21 am
Re: (UNTITLED...)
Posted: Sun Jan 10, 2010 4:12 pm
Yes Yorkshire Lad - you may be right 
I wanted to make a title that was a part of the poem- as in really like first line of it, rather than a title - if that makes sense? Maybe it doesn't! hehe.
I was thinking of 'Without you'- but I can't find anything that rolls off the tongue at the moment, so I am just leaving it blank for now.
A
x
I wanted to make a title that was a part of the poem- as in really like first line of it, rather than a title - if that makes sense? Maybe it doesn't! hehe.
I was thinking of 'Without you'- but I can't find anything that rolls off the tongue at the moment, so I am just leaving it blank for now.
A
x
Re: (UNTITLED...)
Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2010 4:28 pm
I really like this Alisony, I hear you.
If you want a title from the poem itself, 'Perhaps' could work. Simple and central, and ain't it just the truth! Perhaps it should be, could be enough....hope is a wonderful thing when you can grab it.
J x
If you want a title from the poem itself, 'Perhaps' could work. Simple and central, and ain't it just the truth! Perhaps it should be, could be enough....hope is a wonderful thing when you can grab it.
J x
Re: (UNTITLED...)
Posted: Tue Jan 12, 2010 11:33 pm
The best kind of poetry to my mind is the kind that is simple and without depth . Straight from the the heart ! But this poem must have a title you owe it that muchAlsiony wrote: it's not supposed to be complicated or in depth because I wanted it's form to reflect the way that sometimes the simple truth is exactly that- simple. I still don't have a title for it.
Connections and implications
All buzzing round my head
Every angle points the same;
Don't feel like I'm alive -
I simply feel undead
And you know...
As it goes...
Perhaps it should be good enough
That, though I can't touch
I can atleast still feel
Love
Re: (UNTITLED...)
Posted: Tue Jan 12, 2010 11:53 pm
Thanks Juan - Thanks Yorkshire Lad -
It'll come - in time. Whenever I look at it, I get a step further.
Reading it just now for instance, it makes me think 'Summer so out of reach, yet just beneath this cold dark window' - which is almost as long as the poem itself! Haha.
(Maybe that's one step forward and two steps back then - same old same old...
)
A
x
It'll come - in time. Whenever I look at it, I get a step further.
Reading it just now for instance, it makes me think 'Summer so out of reach, yet just beneath this cold dark window' - which is almost as long as the poem itself! Haha.
(Maybe that's one step forward and two steps back then - same old same old...
)A
x