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Feels Like Rain

Posted: Sun May 31, 2009 11:36 am
by Teratogen
Haven't been writing too much in a while. Heard this song on the radio, sounded like the voice of Aaron Neville. Didn't pay too much attention to it except for a refrain he kept saying, "and it feels like rain." I liked that line when sung along a somber tune. I went with it and began writing after having a rather joyless day. Here's the outcome:

Feels Like Rain

I’m tempered and bitter
and my heart swells with rage
when flowers all wither
at the death-post of age
And it feels like rain.
And the stream rolling down
to the banks of design
have constructed a sound
to the grave of my mind
And it feels like rain.

Cars on the highway
Planes in the sky

Everyone’s moving now
to the rhythm of love
And I try to learn how
the clouds toil above
And it feels like rain.
But the desolate fields
with their dirt and their scars
to its solitude yields
a night born without stars
And it feels like rain.
Yes, it feels like rain.

Cars on the highway
Planes in the sky
No one’s going my way

Let’s solder the fences
that imprison our wounds
and devour the senses
while the garden still blooms
And it feels like rain.
We’ll feel stinging embers
from the fires of some love
that pain soon remembers
when the sky opens up
And it feels like rain.
Yes, it feels like rain.

Cars on the highway
Planes in the sky
But I must go on my way
Before I see it die

These monsters still living
in strange formality
with wretchedness giving
its lone shelter to me
And it feels like rain.
But I’ve gone to oceans
to seek good company
and soak up the motions
of preferred misery
But it feels like rain.
Yes, it feels like rain.
Still feels like rain.

Re: Feels Like Rain

Posted: Sun May 31, 2009 8:56 pm
by Geoffrey
Hi Teratogen. That was very uplifting, thanks.

Re: Feels Like Rain

Posted: Mon Jun 01, 2009 10:59 am
by Teratogen
It was?

Re: Feels Like Rain

Posted: Mon Jun 01, 2009 11:14 am
by mat james
That was very uplifting, thanks.
Ha! Ha! :lol:

"devour the senses
while the garden still blooms" Great line (or 2) Tera t !

There is hope in this one line and it is packed with poesy. (I hope I'm not insulting you!) ;-)

MatbbgmephistoJ

Re: Feels Like Rain

Posted: Mon Jun 01, 2009 3:55 pm
by lizzytysh
As for me, Jason, I'd like to hear your song sung. After you wrote it, have you been doing that? Sometimes we just have to wallow in our sadness first before we can come through and out of it. Perhaps, it will rain and that will be your cleansing after the wallow.

It's very expressive and I like that.


~ Lizzy

Re: Feels Like Rain

Posted: Mon Jun 01, 2009 7:44 pm
by Eskimo
....since the song, with a some help from a bad day, led to this work, you may want to check out John Hiatt's original version (found here) or another great cover by Buddy Guy with some help from Bonnie Raitt (found here)....Aaron Nevilles' cover is found here....

Re: Feels Like Rain

Posted: Tue Jun 02, 2009 12:06 am
by John K.
Teratogen wrote:It was?
Hey T, long time no see.

Did you see Mr. Cohen on this tour?

Re: Feels Like Rain

Posted: Tue Jun 02, 2009 11:24 am
by Teratogen
Yes, I certainly did!!! A moment in my life which I will NEVER forget. :D And it is good to see you around too.

I wasn't aware that John Hiatt did the original. Like I said, it was Aaron Neville on the radio, just happened to catch a few earfuls and remembered the refrain. I went back to look it up and read the lyrics after I posted this here. Didn't know it was a love song the way it sounded so somber! But I must admit I did like it quite a bit.

I didn't intend to make the rain in this poem a symbol of cleansing. It was meant as an unwanted intruder to an otherwise ideal of a happy life. Which is funny, because I actually enjoy the rain. But what I was trying to say at the end there was that instead of suffering the way rain pours down on everything, I'd rather just go to where rain is unneccesary, like to the ocean, where it's a vast body of water and you're just going to get wet anyway. But, I implied that it didn't even matter if I decided to go my way or the way of anyone else it was still going to rain no matter what.

At least that's what I intended. But after hearing some of the comments here about how uplifting it was and how it felt like a cleansing, I re-read my work and saw how some of you came to that conclusion. It kind of baffled me that I never saw it before. Y'know... I think sometimes artists who write, draw, paint, or create anything have sometimes one specific emotion or point or story that they want to tell, but while they wish to focus their energy on one side of their emotion or point or story, someone else is going to feel very differently about it. Sometimes I'll write something and not really even have a clear understanding as to what I just wrote, but someone else will. I liken it to having a dream you don't understand, but when you relate it to someone else they can decipher it and make real-world connections that you never stumbled onto the first time.

But anyway, I thank you all for your comments and am glad you have enjoyed this piece.