Me loving her
Posted: Wed Sep 17, 2003 4:48 pm
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Posted: Wed Sep 17, 2003 7:22 pm
I like your tribute to this woman, Ronnie. Some of your phrasing also seems Leonard-inspired.
Posted: Wed Sep 17, 2003 10:34 pm
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Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2003 6:05 am
Well, I wasn't thinking plagiaristic, Ronnie. Simply that his words and phrasings work their way into our thoughts and the words that emerge from them later. It's a natural process, and very complimentary to Leonard.
Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2003 12:25 pm
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Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2003 2:23 pm
That's no bad thing, Ronnie.
Georges
Georges
Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2003 2:12 pm
"Too much"/"too long" ? How can this be 
? Not from where I sit 
. It seems Leonard also commented on how things are taken in and re-emerge in similar form later. You know that old saying, "There's nothing new on earth"? Well, there ya go ~ 
? Not from where I sit . It seems Leonard also commented on how things are taken in and re-emerge in similar form later. You know that old saying, "There's nothing new on earth"? Well, there ya go ~ Me Loving Her
Posted: Tue Sep 30, 2003 7:36 am
Hi Ronnie~
This is truly beautiful! A little paraphrased derivation does not detract from
the honesty of your heart. (Apart from a Cohenesque phrase or two, there are some a little reminiscent of Sting, also). And why not; great poets of the heart always have an influence on those who love.
One small suggestion, re: the penultimate line, 2nd stanza; could use a small word (like 'then', for instance) to harmonize the rhythm.
(Penultimate is '2nd last', so no-one is confused).
I really love this poem, Ronnie.
~Makera
This is truly beautiful! A little paraphrased derivation does not detract from
the honesty of your heart. (Apart from a Cohenesque phrase or two, there are some a little reminiscent of Sting, also). And why not; great poets of the heart always have an influence on those who love.
One small suggestion, re: the penultimate line, 2nd stanza; could use a small word (like 'then', for instance) to harmonize the rhythm.
(Penultimate is '2nd last', so no-one is confused).
I really love this poem, Ronnie.
~Makera