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When I close my eyes?

Posted: Sat Jun 21, 2008 4:30 am
by Cate
When I close my eyes?

I think of a stranger's hands,
what they might feel like,
of a friend whose touch I miss -
the girl from Greg's ice cream shop
who samples more than she sells.

I think of you in long grass,
how the sun blessed us then -
Lies the old told of winter.
I touch my nipple where
a freckle once resided, then
think again of a stranger.

Re: When I close my eyes?

Posted: Sat Jun 21, 2008 5:42 am
by mat james
I hope this is only part 1. Cate!

Re: When I close my eyes?

Posted: Mon Jun 23, 2008 8:33 pm
by Manna
Reminds me of my few brief attempts at meditation. How every unrelated thought comes forward, and you get a little lost in yourself. People who meditate often praise the practice quite highly. Same with praying folk.

Why is the question mark there? I think that is what interests me most about this poem.

When I close my Eyes?

Are you asking if the title is ok? Are you wondering if something other than eyes is closing?

Re: When I close my eyes?

Posted: Mon Jun 23, 2008 10:30 pm
by William
What a wonderful piece of writing.
Well done - good stuff.
Encore!

God bless,
William

Re: When I close my eyes?

Posted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 9:51 am
by mat james
Maybe you're thinking of a young Leonard Cohen? ;-)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RLq7Aqd_ ... re=related

Re: When I close my eyes?

Posted: Wed Jun 25, 2008 2:05 am
by jimbo
yes Cate i like it....

I like ice cream in the long grass
Even with a stranger
its the danger.danger .danger

Re: When I close my eyes?

Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 4:20 pm
by Cate
sorry for a delayed response.
Manna wrote: Why is the question mark there? I think that is what interests me most about this poem.

When I close my Eyes?

Are you asking if the title is ok? Are you wondering if something other than eyes is closing?
Hi Manna - I'm just pretending to be talking to you - the reader. When someone asks me a question, I often repeat what I think they've said just make sure I got it right . Occasionally I'm way off base, which could lead to a much more interesting answer then anyone would care to know.

Mat - I do like that song - but it would be an older Leonard Cohen that I would think of. He was in his 50's when I discovered him and although I forgive him for once being young, I definitely prefer his voice rougher and deeper and his face with more character.

Hey James - Make sure to remember your sunscreen!

and William
William wrote: Well done - good stuff.

William
Why thank you! I liked it myself.
I hope you're not being nice to me now, because I fed you pretend marshmallows.