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.. Alright.. just where is Kissingham now??.. that gives me an idea, actually.. Apocalypse Now, the sequel:

KISSINGHAM NOW..

.. actually, what am I talking about.. it most obviously should be:

CUMALOTT NOW

.. (sorry about the mix-up)..

Captain Willa-- uh, kwi-- uh Sir F.. is a, uh, man without a mission.. a knight without a sword (seems like).. still, with Sweet Princess Violet (flower) in her tower, we're sure to find a story line.. after all, Coppola almost did.. (that was a little dig, if you'll note.. given my "ending" issues with said flick)..

.. the Evilish Queen Cate is still secretly meeting with Henning in her toruture chamber.. (it's where they work out, if you recall).. oh, and that slippery I.F. Duchess person.. rather imaginary these days, as it happens.. is on hand for S&M consults.. (seems the queen is still foggy as to how to properly employ ratchet straps.. and I can't count the number of times I myself have instructed her)..

Lady Kissy K. is awaiting King G.'s return, so that she herself might return to her usual sword polishing duties.. I do believe he's got his hands full with that restless green isle somewhere off the coast aways.. seems the inhabitants there waste too much good liquor by pouring it in their morning coffee, and Lady Kissy K. has asked him to in some manner ban the practice.. anyway, he's still not returned, and actually, I've only just received word that he actually likes his liquor that way, at least first thing in the morning.. so.. don't know how things will turn out in that respect..

.. oh, and.. [pssssssssst.. kw-- uh, Bond Is Bond (is a bo-bon).. (a baby one at that).. (a little chocolate baby bon-bon).. ANYWAY.. sneak around the queen's cellar and see if you can find out what she and Henning are cooking up down there.. remember: Henning means to destroy Leonard from within.. and he's starting with this fine, upstanding kingdom.. once he's destroyed the likes of us, Leonard will be easy to take down.. so.. we're the first (and only, come to think of it) line of defense, as it were.. and thus the importance of your work here, baby bon-bon.. so.. WISE UP.. (although I'm pretty sure I've told you that already somewhere).. Oh, and too bad about Marlon Brando.. a very good actor too.. I guess this tragedy should serve as a warning to us all: don't get mixed up in pictures.. it's a very grizzly business)..

.. okay.. well.. Oh, yeah.. the hanging munchkins.. still haven't really verified that as a Henning tactic.. it might just turn out to be Dick, his blow-up doll beard.. perhaps Henning's just letting him hang there in wind just to scare us.. hmm.. don't know why I didn't think of that before..

.. alright, well.. see what you can find out, baby-bond-bon.. and I'll return to my memoirs.. I've been taking a break from all of that, as it only depresses me.. but.. I guess that's the lonely and oft-times depressing world of a writer, and so I really shouldn't complain.. actually, I'm thinking of writing a very happy love story for a change.. something to send to Bill Shakespeare for a little spare cash.. my working title is: Romeo and Juliet.. I'll let you know how it turns out..
.. signing out: M.]

.. oh, bye for now, Lady Kissy K., your Queen Highness, etc. etc.. (oh, and your Royal Highness, King G.. where ever you are)..

s.p.v. (fl.). xx x (hmm.. think I'll write a little love note to his Lordship, before getting back to work).. (actually.. I'm feeling like taking a little nap.. must be hormonal).. (too bad that crack in the wall is so big, I can never keep the light out of here entirely)..



My dearest Lordship,

I’ve wrapped myself into a little ball on my bed, though I'm
imagining you behind me, your knees pressed against the
inside of mine, your arms resting around me. Why is it lately
that my strongest desire has to do with you and I taking an
afternoon nap?
.. yes, it would be nice if it were on our tropical get away..
actually, I’m wondering now if there are cabanas somewhere
by the sea that we could stay at.. the sound of the ocean
would be soothing, and I should like us to walk along the
beach by moonlight. I’m feeling you should be drenched in
moonlight.. I’m sensing that about you, I mean.. that that is
what you need -- like the way I’d have you take me whenever
the mood struck you.. you could take me right at the front door
before leaving for work in the morning, and I'd feel you for
hours after that.. because I’m sensing too that that’s what the
moon in me would prescribe for us both.. with this love in me
as our healer.. as I’ve no desire to keep it to myself.. and if
this something in me were like the universe.. cast like its stars
or even eternity’s velvet blackness.. it would all be for you.. in
moments impassioned or mundane, or even just silly (as I know
you’d make me laugh)..
.. it seems I’m back in bed.. I feel to be nearly asleep..
.. you’re still behind me.. and I feel your desire, and you take
me.. and even here in bed I’m by the ocean.. pulsing with the
waves.. your fantasies commingling with my sleepy hair like
seaweed dancing.. and I moan slightly to feel so deeply near
you.. and I sense you too returning to me.. your lips caressing
the nape of my neck.. my soul so at ease, to so naturally be
this place for you.. this place from where you escape and then
return to, so to tie me to your wanting..
ever.. your v i o l e t (stem).. xxx



.. edits: I've been tweaking this letter tonight.. I feel I'm finding out more about it as I try and refine it, actually.. and thus, all the edits..

Buckalot! It's so good to see you again.Did you have a good rest after our hard adventures? Me too,but alas,it's now time for us to go back to work, apparently things got a little messy with the Bond agent and Marlon Brando,so it's up to us again Buckalot to save The Leonard Cohen Forum from the villainous Henning (the Mole) and the Dastardly Cackling Evil Queen Cate or is that The Dastardly Evil Cackling Queen Cate for short?
plus Danger Mouse and Dick The Blow Up Peeping Tom with the scraggly beard which I hadn't noticed before.Phew! I need to take some deep breaths here!

Okay, now here's the plan we must go to The Queen's dangerous cellar without her noticing us and spy on her and the Mole, and report back to our wonderful boss V.Surely Buckalot nothing can go wrong this time it sounds quite easy,compared to the Yea Olde Haunted woods or whatever it was called.I wonder where the Lady in Waiting Kissy k is? I think she's supposed to help us or is that just the Bond thingy?

Well then dear faithful steed let us be on our....thump....way!

.. uh, Sir F.. [pssssssst.. bond baby.. take a little break for a moment.. there's some celebrating to do.. (at the end of this post, that is).. and then you can return to your mission. M.]..


NOW, WHAT’S THIS?..

.. it seems our Evilish Queen Cate has a real romantic side.. (something that somehow got lost when she was suffering all the challenges of her Viking Queen days.. you know, with the lethal chariots ‘n whips ‘n things)..

.. but here we learn that the lovely (if slightly evilish -- at times, at least) Queen Cate has found herself a handsome knight through Knights Nightly (I hope I have that name right).. and it seems he just adores her.. and she adores him, etc.. (sorry, but I'm a bit in a rush)..

ONLY..

.. well, Queen Cate knows she must renounce this truest love, and instead renew her wedding vows with King G.. (who is quite a catch himself, I might add)..

AND SO..

..she casts a spell over all of Ca – uh, Cumalott.. (it seem she did learn a few things from that Nude Dude, who knew some magickish stuff after all)..

ANYWAY..

.. (as I was saying).. she casts a spell over all of Cumalott.. covering the kingdom in a blanket of snow.. “If I can’t be with my true love,” the queen pined, “then no one shall enjoy the springtime ever again.. as that is what I once shared with him”.. (don’t know his name I’m afraid -- thus the awkward phrasing there).. (okay, okay.. his name is Sir Lancelot).. (though I thought it was too cliche)..

.. anyway, here the star-crossed lovers tell of their ebullient love..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dsSnNk0CSh0
FULL SCREEN..

AND YET, STILL..

.. all of Cumalott should now rejoice.. even if it’s a bit chilly around here.. I mean, there’s still the lovely nuptials in which to partake:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ot5nnMzjSTM
FULL SCREEN..

.. (King G.. you’re quite the man, I must say)..

AND THEY ALL, FOR THIS POST AT LEAST, LIVED CHILLILY, AND FAIRLY HAPPILILLY.. EVER AFTER..

.. (do I get paid for any of this?)..

Sweet Princess Violet (flower).. (hoping to find a dress that looks good, but is warm enough)..

.. [pssssst. bond.. meet me near the basement]..

Dear SPV(f)

Nice to know you are safely back in the tower…I will try to get Evil Queen cate to repair the stairs or at least stop hiding the ladder. Maybe if you sold a few more of your stories to that Bill guy, we could afford to have a lift installed, we would need to find someone strong enough to winch it up and down all day, (as we don’t have electricity yet)…

Maybe Evil cate is getting fingering instruction from this Henning person, she did show quite an interest in his fingering technique when mentioned before, and even admitted knowing some one who used said technique whilst playing his guitar!

When I was passing the dungeon the other night I did hear some very strange noises, it sounded like queen cate was gargling or something…Maybe she was wine tasting…Some one should have told her to spit it out…

Do you think it’s a good idea to send kwills…er…Bond…Sir F…down to the cellar, you know what happened last time…It took us ages to untie him and get that mask off! …We don’t want to find him hanging about with all the other munchkins! …

Sir F...Please don't go down in the cellar alone...Lady K will hold your lickle handy if you like! ...urhhh, maybe not..what is that?...It's all sticky...Ok Sir F, hand over the lollipops...you know violet doesn't let you have them...She said you made her finest gown all sticky with your ickle sticky fingers last time, and she was none too pleased...

Good luck with writing your new story (though I doubt there is any such thing as a happy love story…they all end in tragedy one way or another). I like the title though, very catchy…

Well must go and get the Kings chambers ready for his return (that’s if he remembers where he resides). And I tend not to worry too much about him putting liquor in his morning coffee, as long as it’s only the inferior Irish Whiskey and not My good Scotch Whisky(i know i can safely say that as he is not back in Cumalot yet)… And as long as it gets him Up in the morning I won’t complain! … Must say I’m looking forward to getting back to my polishing duties, haven’t got my hands on a good sword for ages, And I bet it could really do with a good rub and some lubrication…wouldn’t want it to go rusty! …

Keep in good spirits sweet violet, give my love to Bill when you see him and tell him loved the local angle on his latest little story, the one he wrote about a couple of my friends from Windsor… Though it was very naughty of him to use that knick name he gave me, (Mistress Quickly was meant to be our little secret). And I think he modelled Sir (J) F on kwills…And that was quite cruel dressing him up like that and luring him to the Old Oak in Windsor forest…(You know they’ve turned it into a tavern now)…Ah well…

Must away and prepare for the return of King G…Mmmm now where did I put that sheath for that sword? …

Lady Kissy K
xx

Sorry Violet missed your post (youre too quick)

Like the snow but much prefer May. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cg4YrOlAkds

SPVF M boss, The Evil Cackling Dastardly Queen Cate in love with Dick Lance's a lot! Hmm don't tell Kissy k she'll be ever so jealous especially as King G is missing!

Psst V I'm here!

.. [psssssssst.. kwillsies.. I mean -- bond-bon.. we'll have to get down to biz later.. just wanted to post a little something on my itty bitty break I'm taking].. [I'm trying to be good today]..

.. okay, this is a little coffee-clatchie INTERMISSION of sorts.. yes, I know I'm getting loose with these intermissions -- wait, on the other hand, who really cares?.. I mean, is there some kind of "intermission monitor" or something?.. (oh, cripes, Henning)..

.. anyway.. not sure WHO this is, actually.. in fact, she seems a bit unsure herself.. in any event, I think we both agree that she just might be Queen Cleopatra, given the eye make-up, at the very least.. (I just love her drinking-with-mom story, by the way)..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IobeUEUbMJA
FULL SCREEN..

.. anyway, girls, what do you think?.. don't you think she'd fit right in over here??.. the movie posters alone win my vote.. and the Jesus & Mary bracelet??.. (with bits of Mary, and her favorite Jesus).. oh, and Lady K.. how 'bout the sexy priest calendar????????.. (seems you're not the only one with this fixation)..

okay.. back up the tower,
s.p.v. (fl.).. xx x

Dearest SPV(f)

I think she would fit right in here (she's completely nuts)...

Loved the movie posters...not sure on the bracelet...(which bits of Mary are in it)...

Think the priests could have at least got their kit off...Sexy and Celibate...Doesn't really work does it...May have to rethink the priest fixation!(or find one ripe for converting)...

Lady K
xx

Karren B wrote: Think the priests could have at least got their kit off...Sexy and Celibate...Doesn't really work does it...May have to rethink the priest fixation!(or find one ripe for converting)...

Converting ... well that's the very sexy thing about a priest/nun the whole conversion idea ... that and the communion thing ... ohhh and the robes of course ... and then there's the naughty thing - nobody can do naughty like a good catholic girl or boy!

Yes, Violet she'd be perfect for here - great accent and jewelery. I checked out her age just in case (23) - I think we're already running a risk with the one minor that we have!

edit - added on
ohhh and the kneeling thing - how could I forget the kneeling thing - very sexy, although a bit hard on your knees as they have you up and down for the whole service.

cate

Ive never met a good Catholic boy, only bad ones...(Oh and so impressionable)...

I do think she would fit in here though...

Oh and there's nothing minor about kwills...er...Sir F...er...Baby Bond...(think he was at the bottle again last night)...

Karren
xx

Always willing to kneel for the right man...er...Priest...You know just to say a prayer or two...(If I were catholic how long per day would you calculate that I might spend in confession?) Umm...Maybe I won't convert after all...

ohhh I thought you wanted the priest to convert

Ive never met a good Catholic boy, only bad ones...

well I'm guessing that the goodest ones would be the baddest ones.

Oh! sorry we're back, got a little sidetracked with the priest thing and yes ,she'd fit in here!

Anyway old chappies and lassies back to the plot what!what! ahem!

I'll just creep down the cellar stairs carefu................thump!,clank!,bang! clatter!.OUCH.. MUMMY! sob.

Yikes! erm...hello..QC...urm..hello Hhhennning..I..I ..was......just ...inspecting..the cellar stairs! yes that's it! I was inspecting the cellar stairs when I fell down them! You see someone reported them as being very dangerous and yes they are!! so please be very careful in case you hurt yourselves.If it's alright with you I'll just crawl up them and go home or maybe pop into the local hospital first?

Oooh kwills, that’s a nasty bump you have there on your head, and should your arm be twisted like that? … It’s a shame that we haven’t got any hospitals in Cumalot yet!

(I know violet said to follow you but i'm glad i didn't, that could have been me falling down those steps)...

That was very good the way you talked your way out of that one, I think they believed you! …

You do that crawling thing very well!...
Would you like Kissy to fetch your blankie and your bottle?

Lady K
xx

.. [oh, hi lady k.. you need to view this stuff too]..

kwills wrote:Oh! sorry we're back, got a little sidetracked with the priest thing and yes ,she'd fit in here!

Anyway old chappies and lassies back to the plot what!what! ahem!

I'll just creep down the cellar stairs carefu................thump!,clank!,bang! clatter!.OUCH.. MUMMY! sob.

Yikes! erm...hello..QC...urm..hello Hhhennning..I..I ..was......just ...inspecting..the cellar stairs! yes that's it! I was inspecting the cellar stairs when I fell down them! You see someone reported them as being very dangerous and yes they are!! so please be very careful in case you hurt yourselves.If it's alright with you I'll just crawl up them and go home or maybe pop into the local hospital first?

.. well, I hope they bought that, kw-- uh bond.. because I just got some old footage on Henning.. seems he was was once sentenced to be quartered.. only.. given his evilish what-have-you's [really tired right now, folks].. it seems he -- I don't know, either came back from the dead.. or the quartering thing didn't do the "whole" job, if you will.. [note: lame attempt at pun]..

.. oh, and the barrister looking person with the purple wig is an imposter -- definitely not his Lordship.. (I'm getting pretty good at this, aren't I, my lord?)..

okay.. here goes:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N0LHoHRtNLY
FULL SCREEN..

.. [note Count Callous at the end, who we can assume Henning morphed into]..


.. [someone please get me profes-- oh, wait, I have professional help.. hmm.. need to rethink that then]..

.. [oh.. having viewed this again, it seems it was Count Regula, or something, that Henning morphed into.. it's Henning's little joke, actually.. as if he were a "regular" guy].. [I still prefer "Count Callous"]..

Baby Bond Bond/ Sir F!!! Christ you could at least clear your throat or perhaps knock before rolling in on folks ... we were just making sure that some of Mistress I.F. 's little gadgets were safe - frankly I'm a bit concerned that somebody could get hurt down here. You know you didn't have to run off like that - you could have stayed for some tea.

Violet wrote: .. oh, and the barrister looking person with the purple wig is an imposter -- definitely not his Lordship..

are you sure princess - he seemed very official?

did you see who was there though - my friend with the mask!!!!
See how talented he is! he made that golden mask himself. the smile of course represents his optimism and hope and the gold his spiritual outlook on life - he was very artistic!!!!