Dispreached

[lazariuk]

Dispreached
by the flowers
Dispreached
by the trees
Dispreached
by diamonds
under his knees

Dispreached
by the song
Dispreached
by the book
Dispreached
by taking
a second look

Dispreached
by a saint
Dispreached
by a liar
Dispreached
by a gaze
into the fire

Dispreached
by a woman
Dispreached
by her lover
Dispreached
by a Queen
who stayed
under cover

[abby]

Bravo!

[Cate]

Interesting list poem Jack. When reading I tended to group lines so that it read as four, three line stanza’s with lines 2 and 3 rhyming.
The idea of being dispreached is an interesting one. Preached by - dispreached by.

[lazariuk]

Bravo!

Thank you Abby. I was very pleased with how it came to me to be written.

[lazariuk]

The idea of being dispreached is an interesting one. Preached by - dispreached by.

Hi Cate
I thought there should be such a word and i couldn't find one so I invented it. I was trying to figure out what was happening with those little birds in Anthem who Leonard once preached to.

Maybe if the word got around people might take a second look about staying in the places where preachers have placed them, including those preaching the dogmas of science.

[lazariuk]

When reading I tended to group lines so that it read as four, three line stanza’s with lines 2 and 3 rhyming.

I don't really know what you mean. Can you give me a little example? Also do you feel that there is a possibility that most others tend that way as well?

[Cate]

oh I just meant that I read it like this,

Dispreached by the flowers
Dispreached by the trees
Dispreached by the diamonds, under his knees

Dispreached by the song
Dispreached by the book
Dispreached by taking a second look

Dispreached by a saint
Dispreached by a liar
Dispreached by a gaze into the fire

Dispreached by a woman
Dispreached by her lover
Dispreached by a Queen who stayed under cover


I'm still thinking about dispreached - it seems that there could be a concern of the dispreacher - preaching ...

maybe because you've used fire - I'm thinking of William Blake who seemed to be a big God fan, but not a big fan of religion or preachers.

~-~
Hello there Abby way up high - it's nice to you.

[lazariuk]

oh I just meant that I read it like this,

Dispreached by the flowers
Dispreached by the trees
Dispreached by the diamonds under his knees

Dispreached by the song
Dispreached by the book
Dispreached by taking a second look

Dispreached by a saint
Dispreached by a liar
Dispreached by a gaze into the fire

Dispreached by a woman
Dispreached by her lover
Dispreached by a Queen who stayed under cover


I'm still thinking about dispreached - it seems that there could be a concern of the dispreacher - preaching ...

maybe because you've used fire - I'm thinking of William Blake who seemed to be a big God fan, but not a big fan of religion or preachers.

~-~
Hello there Abby way up high - it's nice to you.

thank you Cate. I see what you mean and i like it. It lets me see something that I didn't see before and so below I made some changes

Dispreached by the flowers
Dispreached by the trees
Dispreached by diamonds, under his knees

Dispreached by the song
Dispreached by the book
Dispreached by taking a second look

Dispreached by a saint
Dispreached by a liar
Dispreached by a gaze into the fire

Dispreached by a woman
Dispreached by her lover
Dispreached by a Queen under cover

I was also wondering how it would sound if I just left the title as Dispreached and wrote

by the flowers
by the trees
by diamonds under his knees

by the song
by the book
by taking a second look

by a saint
by a liar
by gazing in the fire

by a woman
by her lover
by a Queen under cover

[imaginary friend]

I like your last version best Jack, with Dispreached only in the title.

'Dispreached' makes me think of losing your grip and slipping into the Masterpiece, rather than 'going astray'... but I guess they're really the same thing. I agree with Cate, it's an interesting concept. (I want to be dispreached)

[Violet]

... I have a little dispreaching whip I could try using on you I.F... for the dispreaching part of my dominatrix training, I mean...

.. (for anyone else reading this, I did not write any of this, so just put it out of your mind.. or.. maybe Geoffrey made me do it)...

[lazariuk]

I like your last version best Jack, with Dispreached only in the title.

'Dispreached' makes me think of losing your grip and slipping into the Masterpiece, rather than 'going astray'... but I guess they're really the same thing. I agree with Cate, it's an interesting concept. (I want to be dispreached)

Thank you Imaginary friend

I also think that Cate has a very valid point when she says:

'm still thinking about dispreached - it seems that there could be a concern of the dispreacher - preaching ...

I have given that some thought and thought that a good title might be
"Who is dispreaching?"

and so

Who is Dispreaching

by the flowers
by the trees
by diamonds under the knees

by the song
by the book
by giving a second look

by a saint
by a liar
by a gaze in the fire

by a woman
by her lover
by a Queen under cover

[lazariuk]

(I want to be dispreached)

By the way, don't for a moment think that went by unnoticed.

[imaginary friend]

If one must preach, then please let him preach about the joy of being Dispreached.

(Jack, shouldn't the title be 'Who is Dispreached'?
'Dispreached' has a kinda rebel feel to it.
'Dispreaching' sounds kinda snobby... )

Violet. Vi-O-let. You are hereby banned from the Haiku thread.

[imaginary friend]

Dat preacher jus' been dispreachin' but
dis preacher done been dispreached –
fell in love with the world, no turnin' back
hung up his robes; says 'that is that'.

(...whistling...)

[lazariuk]

(Jack, shouldn't the title be 'Who is Dispreached'?

no