Memories of a Neglected Child

[Pope]

Action for Children are running a campaign in the UK.
It prompted me to remember a neglected child I encountered whilst teaching.
Read more at my blog http://glynpope.blogspot.com/
glyn

[Geoffrey]

Action for Children are running a campaign in the UK.
It prompted me to remember a neglected child I encountered whilst teaching.
Read more at my blog http://glynpope.blogspot.com/
glyn

great blog; thanks

[Evie B]

Hi Pope
I have seen the TV ads and feel this is a really worthy cause.
My only question is do you know how does the Charity become involved in making it better for these neglected children? How do they become involved? Maybe as a follow up to, say, a teacher contacting Social Services? I am just trying to understand how they step in and help.
Kindest
Evie B

[Pope]

Evie, I've used your question as the topic for my blog tomorrow (Monday).
Best wishes
Glyn

[GinaDCG]

Evie B asked: "My only question is do you know how does the Charity become involved in making it better for these neglected children? How do they become involved? Maybe as a follow up to, say, a teacher contacting Social Services? I am just trying to understand how they step in and help."

(I reveal my internet illiteracy by showing I do not know how to copy and paste from previous postings with the cool shading other, more computer literate posters, accomplish. My daughter returns home today. Perhaps she can school me.)

I lot of good can be accomplished just by making people more aware of a situation, and, by so doing, redefine the parameters of what is and is not, abuse. It really does take a village to raise a child and that village's public, group definition of what is and is not acceptable parental behavior can and does change behavior.

[Evie B]

Thanks to you both, Gina and Glyn, for answering. I look forward to catching up with your blog tomorrow Glyn.

Evie B

[Pope]

Gina - your post will be the core of my blog this coming thursday.
Best wishes
Glyn

[GinaDCG]

Gee, Pope, you may regret encouraging me. I thought about adding this yesterday, but then thought, naaah nobody will want to read another story. (I am Irish on my Mother's side and telling stories is part of the DNA.)

Once upon a fairly long time ago (40 years or so:) A child I knew - age 4 at the time of this tragedy -- was being watched by friends of his parents This child (we'll call him John --not his real name) went out to play from this "different" house. It is unclear if it was explained to him that the neighbor's back yard was off limits. John met another neighbor child -- we'll call her "Mary," and -- either leading or following her (we'll never know) they both went into the forbidden yard and began to play near this neighbor's pool.

Hours later Mary's body was found dead in the pool. Mary and John had been seen playing together earlier in the day and so the hunt began for John -- who was found in his temporary caretakers' basement calmly playing with blocks. He became agitated and hysterical when adults began to question him. When pressed further he (as an adult then present once described it to me:) "just shut down."

For many years thereafter whenever this incident was discussed blame was assigned: "Those people who were supposed to be watching John were at fault." "Mary's parents were at fault" "John was at fault" John always claimed to have no memory of that day. I believe him.

But a few months later, and after much personal and embarrassing (for the families involved) public debate, my state passed an "attractive nuisance" law which required certain domestic fixtures, such as pools and trampolines, to be secured behind a 6' fence to discourage children from getting into serious trouble.

This story was at the forefront of my life recently when repair work on an empty house down the street required a big chunk of a fence to be temporarily removed, leaving the pool easily seen, and accessible, from the road. I complained to our municipal building inspector and the workmen now leave a plastic mesh fence over the opening when they are not on site. The workman know that I'm the one who complained, so I had to endure some rude comments as I walked by with my dog. I tried once to remind them why we had the attractive nuisance law and by so doing, hit "replay" on those arguments I heard so many years ago about John: "Well parents should keep an eye on their own kids," "Well, then it'd be the kids own fault and maybe kids like that OUGHT to drown -- that'd show their parents a thing or two."

Sigh. So some questions are never fully resolved, but by encouraging dialogue we -- as a society -- can make progress.

Gina

[Pope]

You are so right,
and such a tragic story.
Children of a young age need to be watched all the time.
But who can we trust.
Recently in the UK there have been paedophile accusations made against a nursery nurse.
The nursery that my grandson attended was exposed as poor in its care on a TV programme.
Glyn