Daddy's Little Princess.

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Karren B
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Daddy's Little Princess.

Post by Karren B »

Here’s one that was inspired by Byron’s ‘Girls night out’ thread, where the topic of little princesses was mentioned.

Daddy’s Little Princess.

Daddy, Daddy look at me! I have a brand new dress,
Mummy said to take it off before it is a mess,
You wouldn’t make me do that daddy, not your little girl,
I look just like a fairy… and she gave her dad a twirl.
He look into her big blue eyes, she knew he would be kind.
Keep it on for just a while I’m sure your mum won’t mind.

Daddy, Daddy look at me! I’ve got a leading part.
I’m better than the other kids, you told me from the start.
Daddy help me learn my lines, cause mummy doesn’t care,
And when we’ve finished doing that, then you can brush my hair.
He stopped what he was doing and he got up from his seat
And helped his princess learn her lines, she said them oh so sweet.

Daddy, Daddy look at me I’ve passed all my exams,
I’m going off to Uni now… You will give me a hand?
I’m going to need lots of cash; a car would help as well,
I don’t think mum is that impressed, no matter, what the hell.
He gave her everything she asked, he stood and waved goodbye,
She didn’t even notice when a tear fell from his eye.

Daddy, Daddy can you help I’m in an awful mess.
You see I need some money just to buy a new prom dress.
It may be quite expensive, as I have to look the part,
And you wouldn’t want your princess to have a broken heart.
He sent her cash, he sent her cards, he sent her blank signed cheques,
He didn’t get a thank you…or a letter… or a text.

Daddy got a phone call, and his face went ghostly white.
They’d found his little princess in the gutter Friday night.
He said it couldn’t be his child; she didn’t live like that,
He’d set her up in Brighton in a lovely little flat.
He knew she was a handful… but that is how she is.
There’s nothing his princess could do that he could not forgive.

They said she had been taking drugs, some heroin and hash.
They said that she’d been turning tricks to make some extra cash.
They took him to a viewing room; it all seemed such a blur.
They pulled the crisp white sheet away and asked if it was her.
He gazed down at his princess, her blue eyes firmly closed…

She wouldn’t have been lying there if Daddy had said NO!
'Take the breath of a new dawn
And make it a part of you.
It will give you strength'
Harry S
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Re: Daddy's Little Princess.

Post by Harry S »

He gazed down at his princess, her blue eyes firmly closed…
She wouldn’t have been lying there if Daddy had said NO!
here are 2 alternative endings for you to consider. they may finish your superb story betterer


He gazed down at his princess, her blue eyes firmly closed
they asked him if that was her and Daddy said "NO, it's clearly a case of mistaken identity, go away and find the right one"

so that is a really happy ending as it's just some totally irrelevant death



He gazed down at his princess, her blue eyes firmly closed
She wouldn't have been lying there is she hadn't been stuffing all sorts of illegal and dangerous substances up her nose


both these suggestions are clearly superb but I am not sure if I have the scanning exactly right.
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Karren B
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Re: Daddy's Little Princess.

Post by Karren B »

Very amusing Harry.

Sorry I can’t rite great prose like what you does!

And is there really such a thing as a totally irrelevant death.(mind you it was an improvement on the posting before the edit)

I think i'll leave it how it is.

Thank you!

Karren B xx
Last edited by Karren B on Thu May 27, 2010 11:13 pm, edited 2 times in total.
'Take the breath of a new dawn
And make it a part of you.
It will give you strength'
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Violet
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Re: Daddy's Little Princess.

Post by Violet »

Harry S wrote:
He gazed down at his princess, her blue eyes firmly closed…
She wouldn’t have been lying there if Daddy had said NO!
here are 2 alternative endings for you to consider. they may finish your superb story betterer


He gazed down at his princess, her blue eyes firmly closed
they asked him if that was her and Daddy said "NO, it's clearly a case of mistaken identity, go away and find the right one"

so that is a really happy ending as it's just some totally irrelevant death



He gazed down at his princess, her blue eyes firmly closed
She wouldn't have been lying there if she hadn't been stuffing all sorts of illegal and dangerous substances up her nose



both these suggestions are clearly superb but I am not sure if I have the scanning exactly right.
.. I prefer this ending.. something about the rhyme scheme really clinches it for me.. (oh, there was a little typo in there, which I conscientiously corrected, being the good little princess that I am)..
Violet
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Karren B
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Re: Daddy's Little Princess.

Post by Karren B »

Very good violet have you and Harry ever thought of doing a double act?

Are you having a bad day, noticed no kisses for Kissy Karren.

K K xx
'Take the breath of a new dawn
And make it a part of you.
It will give you strength'
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Violet
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Re: Daddy's Little Princess.

Post by Violet »

.. as a matter of fact.. I couldn't sleep last night.. then I had this dream.. (which I'm still dipping into now and then).. and I'm having a hard time concentrating on the thing I'm supposed to be doing (at my desk). So, that's the sort of day I'm having.. rather "distracted" feeling.

.. but for you, K., good day, or bad, still I bestow upon thee my tiny, but special-est violet[est] kisses..

v i o l e t (flower)..x xxxx xxx x

much later edit: as I mention in an editing note to come, I am going over this thread again.. [as per below, don't ask].. and, given I'd only recently invented the "two point ellipses" I really hadn't gotten the kinks out of its usage yet. So, I find myself wanting to improve this issue now, as I go over this thread. [unless I just get sick and tired of doing that]
Last edited by Violet on Sat Jan 05, 2013 2:58 am, edited 1 time in total.
Violet
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Karren B
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Re: Daddy's Little Princess.

Post by Karren B »

Sorry you had a bad night and feel distracted, hope you regain your tranquil manner soon.

K K XXXXXX
'Take the breath of a new dawn
And make it a part of you.
It will give you strength'
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Cheshire gal
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Re: Daddy's Little Princess.

Post by Cheshire gal »

Karrenb

Another thought provoking poem from you. How many of us parents would not like to go back and say 'NO' to our children. This is a problem with young people today.. Nobody is allowed to say 'no', be it teachers, police or even parents. You see the results in the Courts today.

Anyone who would not find this an interesting poem are perhaps people who have not had children. Always seems easier when you are not in the same position.

Cheshire gal
'...and here's a man still working for your little smile' -Leonard Cohen
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Cate
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Re: Daddy's Little Princess.

Post by Cate »

That's sad - He sounds like a good Dad.

He stopped what he was doing and he got up from his seat
And helped his princess learn her lines, she said them oh so sweet.


I don't have any daughters - I know if we had had my husband would have spoiled them and in part that's a daddys job. Finding the balance of when to say no, when to be a teacher as opposed to a hero, must be very challenging.

I'm thinking the last line not rhyming is intentional to give it an extra punch which works well. If you were interested in a rhyme for the last line perhaps

the child lying there was no longer Daddy's (little) girl

~~~
edit note - her and girl doesn't actually rhyme :roll: this is why I will never be queen of the sonnet.
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Violet
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Re: Daddy's Little Princess.

Post by Violet »

Cate wrote: edit note - her and girl doesn't actually rhyme :roll: this is why I will never be queen of the sonnet.
.. Actually, you're changing the rhyme scheme here, Cate, in trying to rhyme with the couplet above.. the "blur" and "her" couplet..

NEVERTHELESS.. looking at "her" and "girl" more abstractly (and not in the context of Karren's poem), such subtle "near" rhymes can be far more satisfying to the ear than more "solid" predictable rhyming can.. and so, on that basis alone, you remain: Queen of the Sonnet. Oh, and Karren can be your Lady in Waiting, since "closed" and "NO" sounds right to the ear as well.. again as a subtle "near" rhyme.

Sincerely,
Poet-Princess Violet Flower xx x


much later edit: I'm going through this thread just now.. [don't even ask].. and am correcting typos when I see them [as was the case here]. Also: I'd developed the "two point ellipses" at some point, and only later on did I discover the best way to employ it. So, now.. [if I'm already bothering to edit something in a post, that is].. I will try to improve my use of this device].. [still being the conscientious princess that I am]
Last edited by Violet on Fri Jan 04, 2013 9:57 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Karren B
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Re: Daddy's Little Princess.

Post by Karren B »

Cheshire gal wrote
Another thought provoking poem from you. How many of us parents would not like to go back and say 'NO' to our children. This is a problem with young people today.. Nobody is allowed to say 'no', be it teachers, police or even parents. You see the results in the Courts today.
Many thanks for your kind comments. I think we should say no more often to our children and not take the easy option of giving them their own way.

Karren xx

Cate Wrote

That's sad - He sounds like a good Dad.

He stopped what he was doing and he got up from his seat
And helped his princess learn her lines, she said them oh so sweet.

I don't have any daughters - I know if we had had my husband would have spoiled them and in part that's a daddys job. Finding the balance of when to say no, when to be a teacher as opposed to a hero, must be very challenging.
I think Dads can try to hard to be good dads and end up creating this ‘Little Princess Syndrome’ and you end up with some demanding monster who thinks she can go through life expecting every man to let her have her own way (because her daddy would) and I can assure you it’s a bigger shock to them when they realise that life is not like that, than it would have been if the word NO had been used more often.

Thanks for you comments Cate and your alternative ending (it’s much better than Harrys earlier suggestion).

Karren B xx


Hi V

Hope you slept better and your mind is well rested.
Thank you for the very informative rhyming lesson, much appreciated!

We seem to have the makings of a Royal Household, we have the Queen (Cate)
The Princess (Violet) [not like the one in the poem, of course] and the Lady in Waiting (Karren). All we need now is the King and maybe a Prince.

[Just to clarify my position! Is Lady in Waiting mainly a downstairs role or do I get to go upstairs sometimes?]

K K xx
'Take the breath of a new dawn
And make it a part of you.
It will give you strength'
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Violet
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Re: Daddy's Little Princess.

Post by Violet »

Karren B wrote: We seem to have the makings of a Royal Household, we have the Queen (Cate)
The Princess (Violet) [not like the one in the poem, of course] and the Lady in Waiting (Karren). All we need now is the King and maybe a Prince.

[Just to clarify my position! Is Lady in Waiting mainly a downstairs role or do I get to go upstairs sometimes?]

K K xx
Hi Karren..

Ladies in Waiting (as per my Elizabethan research) are of the noble class, and get to hang with the Queen.. [you know, sewing and gossip 'n such].. tending to Her Majesty both at court, and in her chambers. Oh, and they would no doubt help her in and out of those cumbersome gowns of hers, as well. Now, there are other duties, too, that I'm a bit vague on. [would have to look that up] Courtside, I'm sure they got up to some serious drinky-winking too.. (though I would think the Queen might have to take the lead on that. And yet, with Cate, and her, um, well Screaming Orgasms* [that's a drink, by the way] I should think the strictures of etiquette wouldn't be too severe)

Thusly.. it's a very very good gig, Karren. And no, you are not of the "servant" class. Not in the least. [far from it]

.. in fact, it is a privilege, Lady Karren, to be so honored as a Lady in Waiting.

Princess Violet Flower xxx x



* as per past threads, I believe Cate's done a bit of bar tending in her day.. [thus her extraordinary drink acumen]

.. oh, and I'm feeling a bit better today.. thanks for asking.. xx x

much later edit: as per my earlier post, I'm going through this thread, and correcting typos as I see them, as I did here. [no content changes, in other words]
Last edited by Violet on Fri Jan 04, 2013 10:07 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Violet
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Karren B
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Re: Daddy's Little Princess.

Post by Karren B »

V.

Thank you Princess V.for the insight into the ettiquette of the Royal Household.

This does sound like my sort of role [as long as there's no ironing involved].

So really my job would be to wait around until i'm needed?
Just one last question,
Whilst Queen Cate is having her 'Screaming Orgasm' will I be able to get hold of a good Single Malt? Or do I just get the same as her?

Lady Karren (aka Kissy Karren) xx
'Take the breath of a new dawn
And make it a part of you.
It will give you strength'
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Violet
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Re: Daddy's Little Princess.

Post by Violet »

Good Lady K.. I suppose it would not be unheard of for you to, well, wait your turn, as it were.. and partake of the same.. once the Queen is sufficiently satisfied (with her drink, of course.. which is, after all, what we're talking about.. I think). Then again, a nice single malt might well be on hand (they usually are), when the Queen is exceptionally thirsty.. in which case waiting might get too tedious (!)

P. V. F. xx x


.. oh, and we have Ironic Sue in these parts for ironing.. so not to worry about that. Although she might get to those Screaming Orgasms before you do.. so.. best to keep her busy with all her ironing tournaments 'n such (which truly amuse Queen Cate, in any case). In this way, you might get first dibs as it were. (just a few pointers, as you're new here, and wouldn't know how fast [even at ironing] the ironic ironing champion can actually be)

much later edit: as per above, I'm re-working my "double ellipses" usage.
Last edited by Violet on Sat Jan 05, 2013 3:03 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Karren B
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Re: Daddy's Little Princess.

Post by Karren B »

Dear Princess Violet Flower

Thank you for clarifying a few points for me. I would hate to step out of line.
Of Course Queen Cate should be suitably satisfied and her thirst quenched, (no doubt she will need topping up throughout the evening).

Glad to know that I will not have to partake in any ironing tournaments! But I would like my share of Screaming Orgasms (I’ve heard it is quite a memorable drink!). As long as Ironic sue doesn’t get there first, and it wouldn’t be very nice of her not to share.

Your Humble servant Lady K x
'Take the breath of a new dawn
And make it a part of you.
It will give you strength'
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